


Risk

by sceawere



Series: Risk Verse [1]
Category: Peaky Blinders (TV)
Genre: 1920s, Adopted Sibling Relationship, Catholicism, F/M, Male-Female Friendship, Moral Dilemmas, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Organized Crime, Reader has an established backstory and is basically an OC, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Romani & Travelers, Romeo and Juliet Nonsense, Scheming, copious swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-10
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-21 03:46:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 33,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14276235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sceawere/pseuds/sceawere
Summary: Polly's adopted daughter is pulled into the vendetta in the worst way - working go-between for Luca Changretta himself. Tied up in the secret plan to betray Tommy to save the family, she finds herself at risk in more ways than she expected - maneuvering herself from the edge to the center of an empire in the process.





	1. Risk

You shuffled your feet for the seventh time, re-crossing your legs in the other direction with a deep sigh.

“Could you take your eyes off of me before I have to take them out of you, please?” you asked of the staring man stationed outside the door. You kept your eyes to the panelling of the hallway wall opposite you, tracing the curves and curls of the paintwork.

You saw him frown in your periphery, a laughing man stepping over to him and placing a gentle palm to his cheek. The second man spoke words you couldn’t decipher, moving his face away from you, and tapping his cheek before he continued pacing before you.

“His English isn’t great yet” he explained, his words toned with the accent. You followed his pace with your eyes, waiting until he turned and returned your way.

“He’s making me nervous. Not that your strolling about is exceptionally calming”

He shot another smirk your way, shrugged, and took another, slightly exaggerated, step. You tilted your head, half warning.

“New York?” you asked, nodding up to him.

“Yeah. Born and raised” his smirk turned into a smile. He pulled a hand from his pocket and gestured to himself after a moment “My English is impeccable, huh?”

You couldn’t help but let out a huff of a laugh, shaking your head as he quirked a brow and dragged out the joke.

“It’s alright” you sighed, settling back in the chair with a slight smile of your own “for a Yank”

He laughed, turning slightly on the spot so he was facing you better. He did a look over to the door you were waiting to enter, before moving his gaze to you.

“You ever been?” he questioned.

“America?”

He nodded, and you shook your head. He leant back against the panelling.

“You wanna go?” he asked. You let the question settle in the air for a few moments, squinting up at him.

“Are you flirting with me?”

He smirked, and looked down the corridor with a shrug again.

“You’re the first woman I’ve spoke to since I got off the boat who isn’t old enough to be my mother. I gave it a shot”

You shook your head again, eyes flicking to the door when it peeked open. Words were passed through the gap, and the first man you’d scolded nodded. The door shut again. You looked between the men, sighing when it was clear it still wasn’t time for your introduction.

“I can have them bring some coffee up or something” the man offered, and you met eyes with him again.

“No, I’m fine. Thanks”

He made his way down the corridor and you caught a worried look from the man in front of the door. You checked the watch tucked into your coat pocket before settling back into the chair.

“I’m going to need a better cover story”

-

“Sorry to keep you waiting”

You were still looking behind you, watching flirty boy leaving, when the voice rang out behind you. You swung around, eyes bouncing from man, to desk, from paper to paper. Taking in the whole scene. He was shuffling papers about, hands dancing between the sheets, turning photographs over. The ink on his wrist curled and coiled, and the sight of the rosary made you swallow a smirk.

“I hope my men were cordial” he continued, lifting his head for the first time since you’d entered the hotel room he was working out of. His hand stilled on the folder he’d been closing, until he dropped it all together, and straightened up behind the desk.

“One didn’t speak and the other wouldn’t shut up, so all in all, well balanced arrangement you have out there” you cleared your throat, relieved when he smiled. You weren’t sure whether you’d been trying to make a joke or not, suddenly feeling warm and more than a bit jittery.

“You’re not what I expected” he furrowed his brow, beginning to walk around the desk.

“Yeah, Pol’s a hard act to follow”

He laughed lightly in agreement, motioning to the antechamber. You side-eyed it, scoping out the sofas, the low table.

“I can call the maid up and have her wait in the other room if that would make you feel more comfortable” he said, noticing your apprehension.

You took a deep breath, feet moving over the carpet towards the seats.

“This isn’t my day job. Can’t blame a girl for being careful”

“No, I understand” he replied, following you in, and taking a seat on the sofa. You looked around, deciding on a chair, and began shuffling off your coat.

By the time you’d dropped into your seat, he’d noticed the ink curling around your own wrist, a slight smirk settled on his lips. He flicked his eyes from it, to you, his smile widening as you bobbed your head, holding your wrist up for inspection.

“Yeah, good taste, huh?” you joked, turning your wrist back over so he could see the full rosary painted there. He flicked his own up on the arm rest to show the matching ink you were discussing.

“Polly used to drill it into me when I was little. Me and my friend used to joke about it being surgically attached to my wrist and her dad did tattoos so he did it for my birthday one year. You can see the bumpy line where he started, and I jumped” you laughed, pointing out the inky bulge in one of the curves “he tried to shade it out but…I told him to keep it in. I like that it’s imperfect”

“Jumpy little thing, aren’t you?” he drawled out and you rolled your eyes up, head still bent towards your arm.

“Kept me alive and in one piece so far” you retorted, and he nodded. You dropped your arm fully into your lap and licked your lips, not sure how to start.

“Did Polly explain the arrangement to you?” he asked.

“Yeah, she explained” Polly had laid out the whole plan to you, getting rid of Tommy in exchange for the preservation of the family. You’d screamed at each other half the night, and for the next three days, until you’d sat down and hashed it out between you. And now you were running go between.

“And you agree?” he asked, reaching for a toothpick from the table next to his seat.

“With which part? The working with the Italians part? The working with the people who killed Johnny part? The betraying the family part, I’m not quite sure what you’re asking?”

He didn’t reply, rolling the toothpick around. You rolled your eyes, looking away.

“I might not be blood, but I’m family. Polly practically raised me after my mum died, and I think of her kin as mine. And I’ve watched Tommy make decision after decision that puts my family in danger, so no, I don’t feel great about being part of his death, but I understand that it’s necessary.

John wasn’t a saint. But he was a good brother. Arthur isn’t a saint. But he’s…loyal. To a fault. They’re grown men. They could have left a long time ago. And I hold that sin on them, it’s not excused. But they- but Arthur” you squeezed your eyes shut at the slip of your tongue, still settling into the thought that you were one member down “he stays because of Tommy. He won’t ever be free so long as Tommy is around. And Michael is…probably long gone. But he’s Polly’s son, so I treat him like a brother. And I won’t watch my brother go the same way that Johnny did. If there’s a sliver of a chance of pulling him back from this, I will take it”

You flicked your eyes back to him.

“And don’t think that him being in the hospital because of you is forgotten, because it isn’t. I’m putting it aside for the sake of a bigger cause but if I get the chance to slap you square across the face and hopefully take a tooth or two, you better steel yourself”

You took a deep breath, fidgeting with your skirt.

“But, anyway. I was deep diving into my moral quandary. Listen, I- “you lifted your hand again, wiping it over the side of your face, and rubbing your fingers over your forehead a few times to try and release some of the pressure that was building in your skill “I don’t know. This isn’t my day job”

You sighed heavily, fingers working the skin above your eyes. You dropped your hand, and bit your lip.

“Esme left with the kids. I don’t know when I’m ever going to see my nieces and nephews again. I might never. They’d probably be better off that way. A thousand miles from here is a thousand miles closer to safety. But Ada and Arthur have kids. And Tommy. And they’re still in the firing line. And every day I wake up, and I look at them, and it breaks my heart. Charlie’s already lost his mother, he deserves the chance of a better life. A chance we’ll never get-”

“You’d make him an orphan?” he asked, forehead wrinkling as he looked over at you with sad eyes. You didn’t know if it was fake concern, or if he was just that type of person, the type to feel things. To let them weight on him. Odd job to choose if he was. As if you weren’t sat here making the exact same choice.

“I think the fact that I would consider that a better option for him tells you everything you need to know about how dangerous I consider Tommy to be.

The good he’s done will live on after him, the institutes, all that. The kids will be looked after. But hopefully some of the shit dies with him.

I know it won’t wash away everything that’s been done. We’re far too deep into blood to do that. But it might, just might, be the first step towards amends. Or at least, not drag us further into the chaos. We started off, you know, petty betting shit. We were making good money, we were doing just fine. Some people got pushed around but it was…you know, it was petty. It wasn’t this. People being murdered on their doorsteps, God, we never should have been that”

You shook your head, looking over to the light streaming in through the window.

“If I must…do this…to give the kids a chance…to attempt to save this family…then I’ll take that sin on me” you looked back to him, trying to your head high, your tone steady “does that answer your question?”

He nodded, considering for a few silent moments. The big, ornate clock ticked on the mantelpiece. The cars beeped softly outside the thick windows. He quirked a brow and took a deep breath.

“And here I was thinking you were going to be timid”

-

“And that’s here?” he ran his finger over the blueprint spread on the table before you.

“Yeah” you nodded. You had your ankles crossed away to one side, leaning up beside him as you huddled over the documents on the coffee table. Your arms were interlaced, elbows pressed into your knees as you surveyed the route he was tracing.

He muttered to himself slightly, steps and instructions in what you presumed was Italian, as he worked a plan over in his head. Your eyes ran over his profile, noting the sharp line of a scar above his eyebrow, the shade of stubble as your eyes worked lower. Your lips quirked at the cross marked at his throat. _Good little Catholic boy_. _God, why did he have to be a good little Catholic boy?_

You almost jumped as he turned his head to you, almost too close. You settled for a quick draw of breath, eyes bouncing between his. He trailed over your face, not concerned about being caught staring as you just had, his demeanour too cool as he settled back at your eyes with a light smirk.

You held his gaze for a few moments, before you bottled it, cleared your throat and sat back. You turned your knees away from his, realising you’d got entirely too comfortable, near pressed against his side. You made sure to plant your hand into the sofa next to you, leaning away into the slightly cooler air. You needed physical space between you and the man you should absolutely under no circumstances be attracted to.

He didn’t move from his place though, arm still draped lazily over his own knee as it extended out towards the papers you’d brought to study. He ran the tip of his finger over the edge of the carved wood, back and forth, back and forth, as he kept eyes to your profile. Which made it hard to shut down the part of your mind that was begging you to lean back in, to take another breath of whatever hell type of cologne he was wearing that was honest to God, driving you crazy. _Why did he have to be a good little Catholic boy?_

“Here I was, thinking you weren’t going to be timid anymore” he laughed to himself and the roll of his chuckle prompted you to take another long breath. He tapped his finger against the woodwork one last time, before shuffling the papers together, and lifting them as a unit.

“This will help. You did a good job” he rose from the sofa, and started walking around the table back towards his desk. The second his back was turned you took another deep breath, flaring your eyes as you shuffled in place and begged yourself to get a damn hold.

“You have plans for dinner?” he shouted from the other room. You looked up to empty air, your hands gripping the edge of the sofa either side of your knees, as you scowled and tried to work out whether he’d just asked that or whether you’d slipped into a hysterical fever dream.

He appeared in the doorway again, and you tilted your head. He was rolling his sleeves down, paying attention to his cuffs as he buttoned them. He ignored your continued silence as he walked over to the chair you’d originally occupied and scooped up your coat and scarf for you. He threw the bright strip of silk over his shoulder as he sorted your coat out, and you laughed at the site.

He stood, coat outstretched before him, as you rose from your seat. You tried to hold back your smile, but it stretched out anyway, not matter how hard you bit the inside of your lip to try and contain it. You made a show of doing a turn before you rolled your arm into one sleeve, and then the other, holding your breath as Luca carefully lifted your hair out over the collar. You felt the flutter of air against the back of your neck as he laughed, before there was a swish of the silk as it dragged off his shoulder, and he draped it over your own. You fixed your hair again, grabbing one side of the scarf with each hand to give them something to do. You tucked them over your front, turning to him slowly.

“Did you have plans for dinner?” he asked again.

“Yeah” you replied, as if it was obvious that you would. He quirked his expression, and gave a cross between a step back and a turn, freeing the path for you to exit. You started to flee, and had made it halfway to the door, when he called out again.

“Yeah?” you turned to see him bent over the desk, scribbling a note.

“How are you getting home?” he asked, not raising his head. You looked off to the side, fidgeting with your scarf again.

“The train”

He stood and made for the door, swinging it open, and shouting something in Italian at flirty boy. The note Luca had written changed hands and the man (whose name was Matteo you assumed, given it was the only word you’d picked out) read it before quickly before he motioned to you. Luca then disappeared back into the other room, and you stepped out, following the man down the hall.

“What did he say to you?”

“Told me to take you home, come on” he put his hat on.

“Wh-no, you can’t take me home” you argued.

“I’ll drop you outside the territory, and put it about that you’re not to be harmed” he turned when he realised you’d stalled at the top of the stairs, and came back up to you “worst comes, someone sees us, and I say that I was making sure you got back safe per the terms of the deal. Tommy said no civilians, and you’re not one of the hits Luca laid out”

You sighed, nodding, and followed him out to the car at the pavement.

-

Polly was waiting at the table when you got in, newspaper laid out before her. She had her eyes to the page, but you knew her well enough to know she wasn’t reading so much as watching you take off your coat in her periphery. Sure enough as soon as you reached for a chair back-

“How did it go?”

You smiled to yourself, dropping into the chair, and crossing your arms.

“We went over everything. He seemed convinced” you responded, and she flicked a page.

“Good” she took a short drag of the cigarette that had been burning down between her fingers “how was he?”

“I told you, he was convinced” you shrugged.

“That’s not what I asked” she looked up at you, head still bent to the paper. You tilted your head to her, bouncing your knee with your nervous energy that had yet to burn off.

Matteo has driven you to the edge of the territory, like he said he would. You hadn’t been spotted, but you’d spent the whole walk home going over and over the excuse in your head. There was a problem with the train. The Italians didn’t want any silly mistakes, any excitable young things trying to make a name for themselves, to break the truce. So, one of them had kindly brought you to the border to ensure your safety. A warden over-seeing your progress through no man’s land.

“He was…intimidating. But not…you know...he was professional” you settled on, trying out a series of words in your head. The slight pully of Polly’s lips let you know you’d chosen the wrong one.

“But you didn’t want him to be professional, did you?”

“Polly” you warned, but she just quirked a brow, and looked back down to the paper.

“I know you too well. He’s your type” she teased, using the free fingers that weren’t pinching the cigarette to poke at each other, a rhythm from tip to tip. You sighed, and dropped your head back against the chair.

“Why would you even want that? Me and an Italian? I thought the whole point of this was- weren’t you going off to Australia to get away from them?” you raised your head again as the memory hit you.

“That was before. Clearer heads have prevailed” she flicked the page again, the crack and shuffled of the paper punctuating her words.

“Clearer heads that want me to cosy up to a Mafia boy? Polly, I think you’re still a bit barmy, no offence nor nothing”

She smirked up at you before looking back down. She traced over some of the words and your knee bounced even faster.

“He was very charming, is all. I wouldn’t want you to be taken in. I come from a place of concern”

“Polly…for the love of God, tell me you didn’t sleep with one of the Italians” you unwrapped your arms and leant your palms on the table, reaching out across the surface to her “tell me you didn’t”

She rolled her eyes back up, abandoning the paper, and pushing it off to the side. She took another drag and you shook your head.

“Tell me you didn’t” you whispered, surging forward just a little, and raising your voice to normal levels “Ada told me about your little, you know, resolution. But Polly!”

“When was the last time you- “

“No!” you pushed back from the table, ignoring the laugh she gave as she exhaled smoke out into the room. You turned around the chair, leaving your coat and scarf where they lay, and started over for the stairs.

She called your name, in her ‘serious’ voice, and you turned and returned out of childhood instinct.  You lifted a hand to rest against the doorframe, the sight of your rosary throwing thoughts of its match up that you didn’t particularly want in your mind when faced with your mother figure.

“One day all this will be over. We’re doing this for a better life. For the children, but also for us. It’s so we can have a family again, not just a business. I want you to consider that. Truly consider it. What it means to you. Not what it means to Tommy, or what you think it _should_ mean. Think about it. And one day, when this is all over, you’ll have some choices to make”

“Polly- “

“No, listen to me. If he looks after you, that’s all I care about. I never cared who you brought home, so much as they were good to you”

“You sent the first boy I brought home away because he was ‘unsuitable’ for me” you pointed out.

“Well, he was” she flicked the ash off what was left of her cigarette and you stretched your spine, adjusting your grip on the woodwork “No, but really. If he looks after you…”

“Polly, if you’re saying I should sleep with Luca Changretta so he’ll fall madly in love with me and not let his men shoot me in the head- “

“I’m not saying that. I’m saying don’t hold yourself back because you’re scared. You’ve been well behaved too long. It’s time for risky decisions, and unsuitable men, and fresh starts. We’re all going to be free soon. I think it’s time to start tasting some of that freedom” she reminded you and the words settled oddly in your mind. You nodded softly, and turned towards the stairs with slower steps. Her words followed.

-

“Shelby Company Ltd. Office of the Treasurer” you answered the phone, hooking it between your shoulder and your ear as you shuffled papers around and handed the right ones off to the waiting secretary.

“Good morning, Miss Gray” Fuck. His voice rolled through the phone and your hands stalled. Your tongue rolled to the side of your mouth, eyes to the door as the secretary pulled it shut softly behind her.

Not content with passing contraband notes back and forth for the previous fortnight, Luca had decided to stroll right into the office – at least figuratively – and rattle you at your desk. His perverse love of testing the limits of your ‘timidness’ was bordering on torture, and you hated the buzz that ran up your spine every time you breathlessly threw one of his looping notes into the fire.

 “I’m not legally a Gray, you know” you replied, not able to think of another response quick enough and desperate to fill the dead air. You heard his chuckle and moved the phone, rolling it into your hand as you dropped back into the seat behind you.

“My apologies. I made an assumption”

“I’ll consider forgiveness. Besides, I use it sometimes myself” you couldn’t help but smile when you heard the chuckle on the other end again. _This is wrong, you know,_ your head said.

“Perhaps I could plead my case over dinner. Unless I made another assumption that you were truly engaged last time and not just being polite” he replied, and you flicked your eyes around the empty room, mouth stuttering over the ‘yes’ and ‘no’ that followed.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. I think that’s- “you shook you head, frowning “not…a good idea”

“Why not?”

“Because we’re supposed to be being discrete. Sitting in a restaurant together, where anyone could see us, and report back to Tommy. How would that benefit anybody?” you whispered back, loud enough that it would transmit but quiet enough that the misty shapes outside the frosted glass wouldn’t pick anything up.

“I could have a table brought up to the room if you’re concerned about privacy” he proposed, as if it was entirely acceptable alternative. Your eyebrows went through the roof and you scoffed.

“You really are incredibly presumptive, Mr Changretta” you dipped your tone at the end, his name falling from your mouth before you realised it shouldn’t be spoken in these halls. There was a break before he spoke.

“I apologise” you were about to interject when he continued “again”

You bit your lip, tilting your head back. Again, you went to speak when the door opened a crack and a head poked through. You raised from the seat, you didn’t know why, and swallowed heavily.

“Sorry, they need the contracts for the…painting…thing?” she asked, and you pinned the phone between your ear and shoulder again, rooting through a stack of finished papers for the right label. You held out the reports for her, about to settle down when the door swung back open. You almost physically noticed the feel of blood rushing from your face and hoped it wasn’t as outwardly obvious.

“Alright, angel, here you are” Arthur barged in, announcing himself with a booming voice, a stack of notes bundled in his palm. Damn your stupid tradition of him bringing your pay check to you personally. It had started out as a single event, him proudly presently your first chunk of hard-earned money to you as a teenager, but he’d kept it up. Your little ritual with each other. It wasn’t warm and fuzzy today, it was terrifying, and you about sank through the floor.

“Which one is that? Is it Arthur? I’m still trying to tell you all apart” Luca questioned through the phone, the roll in his words half inquisitive, half teasing. He knew you were ‘jumpy’, easily put off. Damn him. You ignored him, reaching across the table for the paper pressed into Arthurs palm.

“Who is it?” Arthur whispered, nodding to the phone, as he held the money away from you. You felt like you had Luca bundled under the desk, hiding like teenagers who got walked in on, rather than waiting on the other end of the line.

“It’s just a distributor guy, come on, hand it over” you flicked your fingers in and out, a grasping motion.

“A distributor?” Luca questioned, and you swallowed as you pushed to your toes and tried to pull the notes away.

“Arthur!” you implored, and he gave in, tossing the stack to you. You caught it with one hand against your chest, dropping it to the table.

“Moody git” he complained as he walked away, shouting back as he pulled the door “Right, it’s clocking off time. Get your sorry sights out of here, the lot of you!”

You winced as the door slammed, running a weary hand over your forehead.

“That was unfair” you complained, and you just knew he was smirking at the other end. You tried not to picture it. Shirt sleeves rolled to his elbows, his ink on show. You tried not to pull the scenes at each end of the line together as you turned your back to the door and perched on the edge of the desk, an empty chair before you. Tried to avoid the image of him leaning back in it, wrist draped over the wood rests as he looked up to you with that damned smirk. Your gaze fell to the rosary at your wrist, falling into the image of his own hand tracing it, tracing over you. Whether it would slip down to your thigh, how it would feel seeing the ink flow over his wrist as it gripped your hip.

“Jesus fucking Christ” you said to yourself, hoping it had been quieter to his ears than it had been to yours. You let your head loll back as you tried to shake any and all images from your head.

“Am I keeping you from something?” he asked, the smirk evident in his tone. That didn’t help. “Give me an answer, yes or no, and I’ll hang up the phone and let you get to your weekend. I promise. As a point of honour”

He dragged out the last two parts and you about screamed, fanning your hand to shake off some energy.

“I need you to answer something first” you posed.

“Go right ahead- “

“Did you and Polly fuck?” you clamped your eyes shut as soon as the words spilled from your mouth, angry with yourself for blurting it out and not choosing…better words. As Polly would say. There was a long break on the end and you let out a silent scream, holding the phone away from your mouth as you expelled as much air as you could find in your lungs. You slapped a hand up to your face, regretting everything that had happened up to this point.

“You know, I still can’t work you out” he finally broke the silence and you held your breath, your teeth biting one side of your mouth, then the other “one minute you’re nervous as a nun, the next you got filthy words like that come out of your mouth”

You swore to Heaven you heard him tut at the end. You dropped into a chair before you collapsed from either the embarrassment or frustration.

“I just…wanted to clarify. She has a whole…” you motioned your hand in front of you “it doesn’t matter. I just didn’t want any...mix ups or crossed line or- “

“No”

“No…or ‘no’? Just to clarify”

You heard him laugh on the other end and rubbed a hand over your face again, thoroughly embarrassed. At least the blood had rushed back to your face, so you wouldn’t look like a corpse anymore.

“I promise I have had no untoward interactions with Miss Polly Gray, and do not intend to pursue any untoward interactions with Miss Polly Gray”

You sighed and dropped back fully in the chair, slouching down.

“A certain other Miss Gray, well…depends on what her answer is, doesn’t it? What do you say? Will you have dinner with me?”

You took a deep breath, mind spinning as you decided to take Polly’s advice and say to Hell with it all.

“Yes, I will” you lifted from the chair, leaning towards the receiver, wanting to put the phone down just so you could gather yourself “if only to accept your multiple apologies in person”

He chuckled down the phone.

“I’ll do my best to deserve absolution”

-


	2. Understanding

Matteo was at the steps of the hotel to meet your car, opening your door for you as it pulled up.

“Guess I missed my chance, huh?” he joked, helping you out. You laughed and gave him a sympathetic smile.

“Don’t worry, Matty boy. With gentlemanly manners like that, you’ll be snapped up soon enough” he frowned at your words, but laughed still.

“Don’t ever call me that again” he said, turning to climb the steps up to the imposing doorway. You followed up, heels clacking on the damp stone.

“What’cha gonna do about it, huh, tough guy?” you knocked his shoulder as he opened the door for you and nearly missed the eyeroll he gave you, only catching it because you gave a dramatic turn. You smiled as he shook his head, looking over your shoulder as you stepped backwards into the lobby.

“I remember the first time you came here, you were like a little mouse” he pinched his fingers together in front of him “now you’re sounding your mouth off like that”

“I threatened to pull your friends eyes out” you reminded him, and he shrugged.

“Yeah, but you were very polite about it. You asked him nicely, like a lady” he looked down at you with a slight smirk and you returned it.

“Well, I am, as I was then, incredibly nervous” you sighed, shifting your weight from foot to foot, rolling on your toes slightly in the plush carpeting beneath you both.

“Don’t be” he lifted an arm for you to take, hooking your elbow through his “Boss is a good man. He won’t bite”

You tilted your head at the lilt in his tone, the smirk that grew. Another sigh as you both turned was quickly replaced by a sharp intake of breath and a noise of complaint from Matteo as you shoved him back into an alcove.

“Woah, sweetheart- “

“Shit, fuck, and shitty fuck” you whispered out a trail of curses, dipping your head to rest on his lapel.

“Ok…what’s- “

“Those men work for Tommy – well, with Tommy, sort of, kind of. Everyone works _for_ Tommy really, I guess” you whispered to him, leaning back to peer around a well-placed plant that formed a veil between you and them. They were stood together in a group of five or six men, some you recognised, some you didn’t.

You were dipped back, as though you were dancing, when Matteo leaned forward to take a peek as well. You turned your head to him, frowning, and trying to catch his eye. When he did see you, he shrugged, and you sighed. You pushed him back, gripping the lapels of his coat, and swinging you both round to switch places so he could look at the men better. You frowned, patting his chest, as he eyed up the situation.

“Is that a gun?” you whispered, fingers tracing over it's outline through the fabric.

“Course it’s a gun” he tutted, throwing a look your way.

“My head was right there!” you protested, and he rolled his eyes.

“The safety’s on, what you take me for? Just because you lot are living out in the wild west, doesn’t mean- “

He turned quickly as they turned as a group, one of the men pointing up at a portrait on the wall next to the alcove.

“How many of them have I got to shoot?” Matteo asked, the two of you keeping eye to eye, trying to look like young lovers having a moment, rather than members of rival factions trying to hide behind a potted plant.

“None of them!” you whispered back, outraged. You made sure to exaggerate each word, your face screwed up.

“Any of them go running back to Tommy, and- “

“When I said they worked for him, I meant for the company. Like that guy- “you nodded to one of the older men “runs a frickin’ paint company for goodness sake. He gave me a lecture on the history of tint chemistry one time, he’s not shooting up anyone”

You sighed, looking over at the door as rain started to patter against the glass. You hoped it wouldn’t bother the men, and that they’d leave soon enough, so you could scurry up the stairs and hide in shame for the rest of the night.

“They’re legit business men, ok? I’m not even sure they know Tommy’s Tommy. I mean, they must know, I guess. But you know, whether they understand, whether they care, I don’t… know what I’m even trying to explain. Regardless- “you re-adjusted your grip on his lapels “I go to the galas and stuff sometimes, Tommy gets bored of trying to act all proper and respectable, and the executives sometimes need a pretty face to open up their contracts, so…they’ll recognise me. Is all. And all it takes is them dropping a ‘oh, I saw you at the hotel!’ in front of Tommy and we’re done”

“Well, we can’t stand in the shrubbery all night” he snarked, and you scowled up at him.

“Is there a side-entrance? Can we go up the service stairs or something?”

“No, the kitchens and deliveries are at the back”

“Then let’s go that way”

“Did you hear me? There’s no side-entrance. It’s a 3 miles round trip through town and back to get to that door from the outside”

“I think you’re exaggerating slightly” you droned, and he flicked a brow at you.

“We specifically picked a place with as few easily-accessible external doors as possible, you get me?”

You sighed, leaning back against the wall.

“Well, there has to be another way around this. We can’t stand in the shrubbery all night” you agreed.

-

“What the hell happened to you” Luca asked of Matteo as he shepherded you into the room. You were both dripping wet, Matteo wrestling his coat off and lifting his arms as he looked down at his spoiled suit.

“Blinders in the lobby. We had to go back out and around the back way to avoid being seen. Only problem is, the only way to get in the back entrance is to circle the whole block, and go down an alley to the service entrance” he motioned the route with his hands, movements frantic with frustration, as you abandoned all hope of saving your outfit and toed your shoes off and kicked them away with a huff “could have sailed our way straight up to that window, the amount of water falling out there. Probably would’ve been quicker, how the hell do they not have a shorter way to-”

Both men’s eye turned to you as you let out a noise of frustration, flapping your arms that were stuck in the wet fabric of the sleeves. Finally, they gave way and your coat slumped to the floor. You sighed heavily again, shifting your weight onto one hip as Luca looked you over. Your shoes were strewn a metre away, your coat crumpled on the floor. The hem of your silky dress was splashed with mud and dripping onto the fancy carpet below your bare feet. Your hair was soaked through, probably tatty from where you’d squeezed the curls of their excess water. You gave another deep sigh as Matteo smirked and dipped his head to keep his laughter to himself.

“I look like a drowned rat” you complained.

“Prettiest one I’ve ever seen” Luca replied, a light smile on his face as he stepped over to you. You frowned up at him, pouting as you looked down at your ruined outfit, and contrasted it with his pristine suit.

“I looked like a girl from the pictures” you explained, disappointment heavy in your tone.

“I know you did” he laid a hand on your hair as you sulked, leaning around him when you heard one of Matteo’s soft chuckles.

“I take back everything I said about you being a gentleman!” he raised his hands in defence, smile still wide into his cheeks. He kept his arms up in surrender as he walked over to the door, scooping up his own damp coat on his way.

“Enjoy your dinner!” he said, pulling the door shut behind him.

You took a deep breath, swinging your head back to Luca, who was smiling softly as he looked you over again.

“Don’t” you whispered.

“I didn’t say anything” he motioned across his lips “not a word”

He turned and made his way through the room to another door, and by the tiles you saw on the wall, you assumed it was a bathroom. You looked down, pinching the fabric at your thighs to lightly lift the hem of your skirt away from your ankles, tutting at the state of it. This carpet was far too nice to be dripping puddle water all over, and you looked around for somewhere else to stand.

“Here” Luca returned, holding a towel outstretched to you. You dropped your grip and took it from him, dabbing it over your face, and patting it over the ends of your hair.

“I can’t…” you looked down at the sodden fabric “this dress is done”

You avoided his gaze, eyes to the ends of your hair, and then your arms as you patted them off too.

“Well, I don’t have any pretty dresses lying around…” you looked up to him, and he smiled at your unimpressed expression “but I should have a shirt or two around here somewhere you can borrow”

You bit your lip, dropping the towel to your waist. Your hands were bundled up in the fabric, and they fidgeted with it, the warmth returning to your fingers. You looked down at your dress again, trying to work out how much coverage you’d get. Luca was tall, but not _that_ tall, and you were going to be walking around his hotel room with a significant amount of leg showing. You thought back to all Polly’s lectures on respectability before your dates when you were younger and huffed a little.

Luca was already over by the wardrobe, pulling out a shirt and slipping it off the hanger for you. You ran an eye over the room quickly, looking for a blanket or a sheet or something. The only ones to be found were spread on the bed and so when Luca turned back around he found you staring at the covers intently, trying to work out what to do with yourself. He looked from the bed, to you, shirt still hooked over one finger. You cleared your throat, and tip toed your way across to him, trying to avoid as much contact with the floor as possible. Being caught staring longingly at a man's bed was not a look you were going for.

“Thank you” you whispered as you took the dry fabric from him, hobbling your way over to the bathroom with your skirt bunched in one hand. Once inside, you lay your head onto the tiles softly, rocking your forehead over the cool surface.

“This is a fucking disaster” you whispered to yourself, before laying the shirt over the counter and slipping out of your dress.

-

Luca was crouched before the big fireplace in the antechamber when you stepped back out. You hovered in the doorway, a hand on either side of the woodwork and one foot on the tile, the other on the carpet. You frowned as you watched his shoulders roll. You tilted your head, trying to confirm what he was doing, when he turned back to grab a pack of matches perched on the edge of the coffee table. He caught sight of you, smile pulling onto your face as his eyes ran down your body, straight to your legs.

“Be…a gentleman” you reminded him, and his smile grew, looking down to the matches in his hand. You dropped your hands to your sides and stepped out into the room. You reached over to grip the blanket topping the bed, dragging it with you as you stepped back. A flicker in the corner of your eye drew your gaze. He’d lit the fireplace in the bedroom as well, and the warmth spilled out in to the room, losing its reach eventually as you progressed towards him. He flicked a look up to you as the first match failed to light and he threw it into the grate, reaching back into the packet with an irritated hiss.

“Why’d you look so surprised?” he asked, striking the match and dipping his knee back into the carpet when it flew into life. He brought it to the grate, carefully inspecting the fledgling flames as you crawled onto the sofa, pulling the blanket over your now bare knees. You’d draped your stockings over the edge of the bath to dry, umming and aahing over whether to hide them somewhere for five minutes before you realised it was ridiculous and left them where they were.

“I don’t know, I thought you’d get someone in to do that for you, I guess”

He straightened his spine as the fire came to life properly, throwing the box back onto the table. He stood, taking the short steps over to you, and reaching for a bottle on the side table next to you. He towered over you like this, and you bent your neck back to keep eyes on him as he poured himself a glass.

“You want one?” he motioned with the bottle, and you shook your head.

“I could go for a tea, if you’re doing one?” you lifted your elbow to rest on the sofa back, resting your head on your fist “though I suppose there’s no kettle up here, is there, so…”

“No, but there’s a phone, and a big kitchen downstairs. And since you asked so nicely, I’ll go through the monumental effort of ringing down and requesting one, how about that?” he took a quick drink, before moving towards the desk.

“Thank you” you replied after him, leaning forward on the sofa to watch him go. Your hands fell to your lap, tracing the intricate embroidery on the cover, as you listened to him ring down.

“They’ll be up in a minute” he explained, coming back to sit at your side. He took another drink, looping one arm over the sofa back, and perching the glass on his knee. He traced eyes over you again, his expression softening.

“What?” you almost whispered, trying to work him out.

“Cosy” he replied, and you burst out laughing, bending back into your knees slightly. He smiled across at you as you straightened back up, settling your back against the chair as you adjusted your legs, so you could turn to face him a little better. You dragged the blanket back over your feet, tucking it around your ankles.

“I didn’t take you for the ‘quiet night in’ kind of type” you joked, and he gave a little shrug.

“I can be domestic” he replied, taking another drink.

“Yeah, lighting fires in a marble fireplace- “you motioned behind you and reached to tip the bottle into view a little better “drinking stuff I can’t pronounce that probably costs more than most people’s monthly wage”

You turned back to him.

“Lounging about your hotel suite in a fancy suit while you contemplate your empire, you’re a real salt of the earth guy, huh?” you rested your elbow up on the edge of the sofa back, close enough that you could feel the heat of his arm through the cotton, and tilted your temple to your fist.

“That what you’re looking for? Nice, honest Joe”

You shrugged, casting as eye back down to the blanket.

“I’m here looking like a wash up and you’re Mr Fancy over there. I might not feel so out of place”

You watched the tip of his tongue as he rolled it over the edge of his teeth, before lifting his arm over your head as he reached to place his glass on the coffee table. He set about undoing the buttons on his waistcoat, draping it over the armrest. You furrowed your brow, still smiling apprehensively as he looked to you, loosening his collar, and beginning to roll up his sleeves. When he was done he settled back and motioned to himself. You laughed, shaking your head.

“Yeah, you look terrible now. Almost unrecognisable. A shadow of the man you were before”

“Anything for you, doll” he replied, draining his glass. Your eyes followed him as he returned the now empty glass to the coffee table, before settling back, and bringing his eyes to yours.

“What did you tell Tommy about where you were going?” he asked, fingers drumming a beat where they lay on the back of the sofa.

You sighed, and adjusted in the seat.

“That I was going to see an old friend from school – it’s kind of a regular event at the moment, I figured routine would make him less suspicious. She’s getting married in a couple of weeks and they’re moving away after, so we’ve been meeting up and…you know, having fun together while we can. Making memories”

“Running wild?” he joked, and you rolled your eyes with a smile.

“I’ll have you know that when you’re not around, I’m entirely respectable” he raised his brows, and you tilted your head, daring him to disagree “you’re a bad influence, Mr Changretta”

“I’ve been a perfect gentleman” he argued, and you nodded sarcastically “I have!”

There was a knock at the door, and he shouted for them to enter. You’d forgot about the tea and now worried about being seen by the staff. Luca had managed to work someone into Tommy’s house without him realising, and the thought that Tommy could do the same suddenly hit you.

You raised your hand, fingers fidgeting with your lip, and obscuring part of your face. You flicked your hair back, hoping to obscure its length and were glad that the water had darkened the strands. Hopefully in the dim light of the room (with just the fires and the lamps lit) you wouldn’t be entirely recognisable, just in case.

“Thank you” he said as the maid left. He reached forward, pausing when he looked back over his shoulder, and found you looking nervous.

“It’s her job to be discreet” he reminded you, and you moved your eyes from the doorway to him.

“I’m not worried about gossip, I’m about worried about whether she only draws one pay check, or if I should be advising Polly to pack a bag and make herself scarce right about now” you whispered back. He shook his head, smiling to himself,

“I picked this place because it was clean. I checked everyone out, don’t worry”

“Did you- “you stalled as he leaned back, resting his arm on the back of the sofa, and leaning into you.

“My men know every face, every résumé– they know the names of every guests in every room. We picked this place because it was clean, don’t worry” he reassured, and you took a deep breath, nodding slowly.

“This _is_ my day job” he continues, calling back to your words when you first met “and you’re adorable when you blush”

“Are you going to feed me or not? I was promised a dinner, and I’m so hungry I’m about to eat that table, so- “

He stood from the sofa, and made his way towards the door before you could finish your protest.

-

“Stop!” you implored through your laugh. You and Luca had moved to the floor before the fireplace as it started to rain heavily outside once again, finishing your desserts in it’s warm glow. He was leant back against a chair, one leg outstretched, the other bent so he could drape his arm over it lazily, swilling his glass lightly in the flickering light.

“I’m not doing anything” he motioned to himself with his free hand, taking another sip with a smirk.

“You’re staring, and it’s putting me off”

“I’m looking at a beautiful woman, what- “

“You’re looking at a woman who is trying to eat her body weight in whipped cream in peace, so avert thy eyes, mister” you took another scoop from the posh crystal bowl and filled your mouth, letting the spoon drop back with a clatter. You lifted the bowl and put it back on the table with the rest of the plates and trays, adjusting your blanket skirt around you as you shuffled closer to the warm glow.

“Stop” you whispered again, catching Luca smiling into the fire.

“I’m not-I did what you asked, what more do you want from me?” he asked, purposefully not looking in your direction as he addressed you.

You licked the cream off the edge of your thumb, eyeing his glass. You reached forward, picking it out of his hand. He turned his head to his hand, then to yours, then to you, as you eyed its contents.

“What is this? Whisky? I don’t like whisky” you said, before taking a drink. You grimaced, you still didn’t like whisky, and handed it back to him. He was shaking his head with a smile as you wiped your mouth with your thumb again.

“What do you like?”

“Vodka” you replied quickly. He looked surprised but impressed, moving his glass to the floor next to him. He let it clink against the marble.

“Every time I think I understand you, you surprise me”

“Maybe you’re underestimating me then” you replied, and he nodded.

“Maybe”

You sat without speaking, enjoying the quiet together for a while. The fireplace hummed and cracked, the rain jotting against the windows in spatters and flows, soft then beating, then dying away again. It was dark out by now, the season bringing the night in fast, but the vast curtains remained open. It put a glow into the room, the cool light melding into the warmth expelled by the fire.

“Maybe we’re underestimating each other” you said, after so long a silence you thought the frown on Luca’s face was from him forgetting what had been said.

“Why’s that?” he asked, and you nodded towards the flames.

“I thought you’d be all fancy big boss, but you light your own fires” you explained, and he laughed, shaking his head, having supposed you were about to make a grand revelation. He picked up the glass, ready to take the last sip.

“I usually have the maids do it” he deferred, and you perked up, mouthing an ‘ah!’ “but- “

He pointed to you with the hand holding the glass, pulling it away from his lips at the last second.

“I wanted to impress the lady, so…”

“You made a fine job of it” you agreed.

“You can thank my grandfather for that. He used to take me camping” he explained, and you burst out laughing. He gave a look of mock outrage, and you threw a hand over your mouth.

“Sorry” you whispered, still laughing regardless “Sorry, I’m just imagining little Luca in his short pants, in the forest- “

You broke for laughter again, as he shook his head.

“It’s a sight!”

“I wasn’t always the auspicious man you see before you” he joked.

“No, I can believe that” you teased, rolling your lips between your teeth. He stared you down.

“What did you think I’d be?” he asked. You thought on it for a moment, moving to free your legs from the blanket and stretch them out towards the fire. You made sure to pull the blanket up around your hips and thighs, keeping the edge of the shirt covered.

“I thought maybe you were…” you stalled, looking up at him “uhh…maybe…”

You squinted, trying to come up with the right words.

“Using me to get to Tommy” you said lightly, grimacing slightly. His face dropped and became serious and you moved to fill the silence before he did.

“You enjoy winding me up and calling the office and…” you bobbed your head about “you know, the secret notes, the teasing. I thought maybe at some point you were going to turn around and let Tommy know and…throw it in his face. ‘I got one of your girls’, you know?”

He reached across and picked a toothpick off the table, rolling it around in his mouth. You supressed the pull of your lips – for all the teasing he gave you about nervous habits, he had his own little tell.

“You think I’d do that?” he drawled, avoiding your eyes.

“Of course I did. You know I should. I didn’t know you. I knew a vague image of who you could be. Tell me you don’t think I was justified” you challenged lightly, and he quirked a brow, nodding towards you. Still considering the flames, rather than you.

“You still think that?” he asked.

“No. Well, a part of me. Little niggling voice in the back of my head, but I think that’s mostly Tommy’s influence, actually. I got the idea from somewhere” you whispered the last part, thinking back to when he’d thrown those words at Polly before “Being careful is kind of my thing, I don’t know if you’ve noticed”

A smirk pulled over his face slowly, and he gave a slow blink to look towards you.

“I trust you” you told him, sincere “I think you tease me because you like it, not because you’re trying to achieve anything. You like seeing me worked up, knowing you can affect me like that. You like that it works you up a little bit too”

It was time for a smirk of your own. He pulled the pick from his mouth as you lifted onto your knees, pulling the blanket behind you as you made towards him. He straightened his other leg, eyes rolling over you as you settled a knee either side of his lap. You dropped the blanket and settled a hand on either side of his chest, rolling your head so you were posed over his, hair falling in a curtain between you and the fire. It cast flickering shadows over his eyes, but you could still see them ablaze as you lowered and traced your lips to his.

You lingered for a few moments, waiting until his breath deepened, before you pushed up and rested back against his legs. You let out a light sigh, smiling nervously at him. He reached across for his glass, remembered it was empty, and dropped it down with a ring. You rolled your lips between your teeth, watching him with a sense of pride at having knocked him off balance. He gave his own little sigh, before reaching up a hand and tangling his fingers into your damp hair.

“Just when I think I understand you, you surprise me”

 

 


	3. Incentive

“I should go” you whispered, dipping your head into Lucas shoulder.

You were still both sprawled out in front of the fire, blanket pulled up around you both. Luca rolled his neck where it was lying over his forearm, tucked behind his head. He had his other in your hair, rolling strands through his fingers. You pushed up from where you lay beside his chest and rested on your elbows, watching his face.

“Stay”

“No” you laughed. He rolled from his back to his side, laying kisses against your neck.

“I’ll be a perfect gentleman”

“Like you’re being now?” you argued, and he hummed. You moved your head down to block his access, and rubbed your nose against his lightly “No”

“No – you don’t want me to be a gentleman or- “

“Nice try. No, I’m not staying” you replied, pulling your head back to make better eye contact with him.

He kept staring back at you with that stupid smirk of his.

“You’re not making me stay!” you pointed out after a minute.

“I’m not doing anything” he shrugged.

“No?”

“No”

“Good. Then I’ll go” you said, not moving a muscle.

“Go ahead” he motioned with his arm. He dropped it back to his side with a thud, smirking at you all the while “Whenever you’re ready”

“In my own time” you replied, and he laughed, his head turning when the phone on the desk rang “or maybe not”

He sighed, rose from the floor, and headed towards it. You wrapped the blanket around yourself, the loss of contact leeching heat from you. You shuffled after him, picking your dress and coat up from the back of the chairs you’d moved in front of the other fire, and headed for the bathroom.

You could hear a muffled conversation as you changed, rolling your stockings up and tucking them into your coat pocket. Your shoes were still damp, and you decided to just carry them out, having only to walk from the lobby to the car, and then only around the corner to the car Polly would send to the pub you’d supposedly spent the night in. You’d walked the full-length home in bare feet before, so it was nothing out of the ordinary.

Luca was mumbling in Italian when you exited, and he threw a look over his shoulder, finishing the conversation before hanging up.

“I left your shirt on the…rack thing” you pointed behind you and he nodded, tilting your chin back to kiss you again.

“Last chance” he whispered, and you rolled your eyes.

“My mother will wonder where I am, Mr Changretta” you smiled up, and he stepped back.

“Yeah, better not piss off Polly, huh?”

“No, no, no, no. Not a good idea” you pulled your coat on, and looped your shoes up. He followed you over to the door, leaning his shoulder into the side.

“When am I gonna see you again?” he asked, and you leaned into the other door, rolling your lips into your teeth as you thought.

“I don’t know. Depends…” you lifted your head and gave a little shrug.

“Depends on who gets killed between now and then, huh?”

“Yeah” you replied, sadly.

“Yeah” he stepped away from the door, and opened it for you.

“Goodnight, Miss Gray”

“Goodnight, Luca”

-

There were men stood around the steps in front of the hospital when you pulled up the next morning, your brow creasing as you scanned across them. Tommy’s men, for sure, dotted about the street in a way they hadn’t been in the days previous.

You stepped out of the car, thanking the man Tommy had assigned to drive you and Polly about now you were basically banned from using any other kind of transport. Your steps increased in pace, turning to frantic strides as you progressed through the hospital. You noticed more and more men you recognised the closer you got to Michaels room. Your brother. He had to be alright. Not your brother. You had a deal.

You pushed a man aside as he tried to step and block your path, and moved through the heavy wooden doors that led to Michael’s private ward. You saw blood on the glass, turning and pausing once you were through. Blood streaked the walls, starting at head height, and you let out a noise of shock. Your hand rose, your thumb pressing into your lips as you walked slowly down the corridor. The lock on the door was shot through, and you didn’t want to step into the view of the windows in case you caught sight of something inside the room you didn’t want to see.

It was only when you heard his voice that you managed to surge forward, pushing the door out of the way, and shocking the men inside. Tommy jumped up, pointing the gun at you.

“It’s me! It’s me!” you shouted, arms raised. He sighed, shooting you a look, and you surged towards Michael. He was slumped on the bed and you crouched before him.

“What happened?” you asked, wiping a hand over his cheek.

“Luca Changretta” he replied, lifting his head to meet eyes with you. They were rattled still, wide and unsettled. Your heart dropped and so did your body, settling onto the bed next to him in shock.

“Where the hell have you been?” Tommy asked, pacing back over to the door, and looking out into the short hallway.

“I…I was up late, I slept in” you replied, absentminded “He came here?”

You raised your eyes to Tommy.

“They got to the nurse. She took my gun, knocked me down” Michael said behind you, and you let your eyes wander over the room “They killed the guard and they walked right in”

“What did he…” you ran eyes over Michael again, confused.

“Put a gun to my head…” he paused, licking his lips, and you saw the hesitation “they heard Tommy coming though, they rushed. It misfired, they…they left before he got here”

You nodded, knowing it was bullshit. What the hell was Luca thinking?

“They checked you over? You didn’t tear anything or…?”

He winced, motioning to his side.

“Pulled a couple of stitches, bled a little. It’s fine. I’m fine” he swallowed again, and you knew it was bullshit.

“You’re not to go out at night anymore” Tommy commanded, and you swung your head to argue “Don’t start”

“Tommy…they won’t come for me”

“We don’t know that” he argued.

“He promised no civilians” you reminded, but the whisper in your mind said: _he promised not to go after your brother, either._

“He got a man into my house. They got to someone in Artillery. They got someone in the hospital. They can get anyone, anywhere, any fucking time. So, you’re not going out at night anymore. You’re not going anywhere without a guard. You’re going to go back to Watery Lane, and wait there” he insisted, his tone final.

“Until this is over?” you spat back.

“Until this is over”

“What if it’s never over? What if this is it? Forever. Tit for tat, on and on, and on. Forever”

“Don’t fucking argue with me” he sighed, setting his gun back into his holster.

“My brother could have died today!” you replied, and he stepped over, grabbing either side of your face.

“Which is why you need to listen to me and do what you’re told. I am trying to keep you safe, so listen!”

You stared at him, breaths flowing deep in your chest.

“I’m staying here” you replied, resolute.

“You’re not fucking staying here” he whispered back, and you raised your brows, eyes moving from one to the other of his.

“I’m staying here. With my brother. They won’t hit the same place twice. At least tonight”

“Tommy, let her stay. You know what she’s like” Michael sighed, palming his bleeding ribs once more.

“Shut up, Mikey” you pulled Tommy’s hands from your face, spinning your head to your brother. He gave a little smile and you dropped your malice, sliding off the edge of the bed.

“I need the loo”

You used the exit through the nurses’ room, not wanting to step passed the bloody wall again. Once you got to the toilets, you leaned against the sink, taking deep breaths.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck” you whispered into the crisp air. You lifted your head, eyeing yourself in the mirror, before bottling it, and dipping your head again.

-

“He spared me” Michael explained, moving his eyes to Polly. You stood by the window, looking down at the men milling about the street below “He said ‘tell your mum that we have a deal’. What deal?”

You turned your head slightly, eyeing Polly. She looked to you, and then away.

“What deal did you make with Luca Changretta?” Michael asked.

“A deal to spare your life” Polly explained, and you licked your lips, bobbing your head. You listened to them sparring, trying to fade into the background.

“We don’t do that to our own” you heard him say, and you sighed as you reached forward and pulled the window back shut. The street disappeared behind frosted glass, and you turned your back to it, leaning against the sill.

Polly stood from where she had leaned onto the table, throwing you a look, before taking another long drag.

“You knew about this?” Michael asked, turning to you. You hesitated, but relented.

“I knew” you admitted.

“You looked Tommy in the eye today and- “

“So did you. You looked Tommy in the eye and you lied about what Luca said” you reminded him, and he shook his head “besides, he’s looked us in the eye a thousand times. He looked us all in the eye and then sent you to the gallows. I sat in that empty house for months, terrified. So Tommy can fuck off if he expects me to sit tight and pretty while he gets more of us killed”

He huffed, trying to process.

“I found a way to save my family” you explained.

“Tommy is family”

“Is he?” you snarked “cos I’ve been living under Polly’s roof for a decade and he still treats me like a stray that wandered in five minutes ago. If we’re family, he should start acting like it”

You folded your arms again, meeting Polly’s eyes.

“I picked the side that saves my family. If Tommy has to fall for the rest of you, so be it” you whispered, eyes tracing the tiles below your feet.

Polly stubbed out her cigarette, pulling her coat off the back of the chair.

“I have to get back, I promised I’d help Linda with Charlie and Billy. She doesn’t like being in the house alone and Arthurs…being Arthur” she explained, moving to plant a kiss on your cheek. You moved to give her a hug, whispering to her.

“Have you heard from Luca?”

“No, have you?”

“No…I don’t understand” you whispered, brows furrowed as you both pulled back. She ran a hand over your hair.

“Stay with your brother, leave the business to me” you nodded, and she planted another kiss to your cheek. She said goodbye to Michael, and left.

You moved to the table when she closed the door, sitting opposite him.

“Why didn’t you tell Tommy what Luca said?” you kept your voice low.

“To save mum” he explained, taking a deep breath “did you know or are you helping?”

You lifted your eyes to him, crossing your legs and rocking one foot nervously.

“Honestly, Michael, I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing”

He laughed, in spite of the circumstances, and you joined him, shaking your head in exasperation.

“You should put it on the agenda for the next board meeting. ‘I propose we change the official motto to: ‘Shelby Co. Ltd: Where no-one knows what the fuck they’re doing’. How about that?” you joked, fingers fidgeting with a slip of paper that had been left on the table.

You both laughed, settling into the silence.

“He didn’t tell me he was going to do this” you defended yourself “He knew, and he carried on like…”

“Carried on like what?” Michael probed, and you shut your eyes. The silence stretched out between you both, as you examined and dissected every word, every look from last night. Had you missed it? The phone call came into memory and you opened your eyes, the realisation hitting you.

“Are you sleeping with him?” he asked, and you flung your head up, staring him down.

“No” you spat back, blood boiling. You didn’t know why you were so outraged by the insinuation. It wasn’t far from the truth. You had spent the night before in his arms, half naked in his hotel suite. Pretending like he wasn’t a murderer. Pretending like you weren’t about to be one too.

“No, I’m just…dancing too close to the fire, I think” you whispered out.

“You’re doing all this to keep me safe. Whose keeping you safe?” he asked.

-

You woke up to the shrill song of the phone in the nurse’s station across the room. You shuffled and turned in the cot they’d brought in for you, letting the first call ring off. The second came shortly after and you sighed, pushing yourself up onto the cool tiles.

“Answer the fucking thing!” Michael grumbled out, face squashed into his own pillow.

“You’ve got legs!” you shouted back, dodging the pillow when it came your way.

“I’m recovering” you heard him mutter, as he shoved his face back down into the covers. You stepped into the little room, bringing the receiver up to your ear.

“Good morning, mother”

It was either her, Tommy, or someone who worked for your mum or Tommy. So you went with the more obvious option.

“Are you alright?” she asked, frantic.

“Mum, yeah, we’re fine” you pushed onto your toes, watching the lump that was your brother under his covers “Michael’s snoring for England. Why, what’s happening?”

“I heard from Luca” she lowered her tone and you realised she must be calling from the office and not the house.

“And?” you whispered back. She hesitated, and you held your breath, realising it wasn’t good.

“I was right. We’re out of our league. And I’ve brought you into it. I’m so sorry”

“Mum…” you rubbed a hand over your sleepy face “I’m a grown woman, alright? You haven’t made a decision for me since- “

“We need to get Michael out the hospital. Tommy’s right, it isn’t safe” she interrupted, and you could hear her getting more and more worked up. You reached to push the doors closed as softly as possible.

“No where’s safe” you reminded her “but he needs to be around the doctors until he’s back to his fighting weight. Mum, I need you to calm down and think this through”

You were used to these calming chats, over the last year you’d got exceptionally good at them.

“He’s going to kill him if I don’t give him Tommy” she admitted, and you sobered up.

“What did he say?”

“He said yesterday was about proving he could get to him. Proving he could…if I don’t follow through, he’s going to…” she trailed off, and you scowled, knowing she was crying.

“Mum…” you sighed, listening to the low sobs through the phone “let me speak to him”

“No!” she snapped through the phone “you have to stay away from him. I was wrong. I should have never let you- “

“Mother! Did he threaten me?”

“No”

“Then…let me speak to him. We’d be foolish to waste…whatever the hell is-listen, I’m going to go see him. Have a car sent to the library, I’ll be there- “you tilted to look at the clock on the wall “by half 12, no later, alright. If I don’t turn up, then you go to Tommy, and you tell him I stormed off because I was upset about Michael, alright? You don’t tell him anything else, you stick to the plan. You tell him…”

You braced a hand against the doorframe, leaning your forehead against it.

“We stick to the plan, alright? If this all goes to shit, we get Michael, and we go to Australia, like we planned, yeah? Six months from now, we’re either running this place or laughing about how I’m burnt red as a tomato, okay?”

She laughed down the phone, the tears still in her throat. You gave a sad smile, trying to hold back your own tears. The door in the other room opened, and a nurse came in with breakfast.

“Listen, I have to go, but…I want you to know. You’re my mum. If it wasn’t for you, I’d probably be dead already. I’m not ever going to blame you for trying to do the best for us” you stepped back, crossing your arm over your chest and playing with the phone cord “even when you do batshit stuff”

“You watch your language with me” she said, and you smiled.

“Half 12” you reminded her.

“Half 12” she replied.

You put the phone down, opening the door again, and swiping up your coat. You shoved your feet into your shoes, grabbing a piece of toast from the table.

“Where you off in a hurry?” Michael asked, voice thick with sleep as he rolled the covers back with a grimace.

You threw down the cup of tea you’d drained, reaching for another piece of toast to shove in your mouth on the way out.

“I need to have a few words with our new friend about what it means to be a gentleman”

-

“Matteo, you’ve been lovely, so I’m going to be a lady about this. Please move out of my fucking way” you spat, squaring up to him once more.

He sighed, but didn’t reply, standing between you and the door. You tried to lunge to the side, and he threw his arm out, wrapping it around your waist. He turned you, so your back was flush to his front, and bent to whisper in your air.

“Sweetheart, you’ve been lovely, so I’m going to be a gentleman about this”

You threw back your elbow into his gut, and he grunted, then swore. You wriggled from his loosened grasp, and barged your shoulder into the doorway.

“I liked you better when you were nervous all the time!” he shouted as you slammed the door in his face. You turned and looked into the empty room.

You stepped forward, tried the antechamber, and sighed. Luca was nowhere to be seen.

“This is unexpected” you turned at the sound of his voice, startled. You rolled your eyes as you noticed the bathroom door ajar, shuffling when he emerged. He was doing his shirt up and you averted your eyes, trying to stay level headed and focused on the matter at hand.

“So was your little goodwill trip to my brother’s bedside. I appreciate it, I really do – but maybe next time, flowers?” you snarked. He finished his collar, flipping it up as he reached for the tie that was laid out on the end of the bed.

“This a personal visit or a business trip?” he asked, eyes set to his folding fingers “just to clarify”

He folded his collar down, meeting eyes with you.

“Don’t do that. Don’t be glib about my brother’s life. I’m not nearly in the mood for it”

“I rang the house last night, no-one answered” he explained, and you shrugged, confused as to his point “I wanted to check on you. I tried the office, they said they hadn’t seen you all day”

“Aww, were you worried for me? Good”

He gave a glib smirk, licking his lip as he moved over to the desk. He messed with his cuffs, and you followed him over, keeping a distance.

“Where were you?” he asked.

“Why do you think you have a right to know that?” you shot back.

“Because I care about your safety” he reeled off, as though it was nothing.

“You care about my safety?” you repeated.

“Yes” he hissed, rolling his eyes up to you.

“How did you know I wouldn’t be in the hospital with him?”

“Wouldn’t have changed anything” he replied, opening letters that were placed on his desk.

“You shot a guard in the face” you spat back.

“Yeah, he was in my way” he explained, and you scoffed, looking around in disbelief.

“Jesus Christ” you muttered to yourself “You care about my safety”

“Yeah, I care…” he wiped a hand over his face “I care about you”

“If you cared about me, you wouldn’t do this. This isn’t the plan, Luca”

“No, this is the job” he said.

“This isn’t…this isn’t the job. What a fucking- “you swallowed, shaking your head. You stepped to the desk, tapping the surface with your finger “We had a deal! The deal was, you stay the hell away from Michael, and Arthur and Finn, and you go for Tommy, and Tommy alone. What were you even thinking?”

“I was thinking I’d give your mother an incentive to finish her end of the bargain” he looked up and you widened your eyes at him.

“God, if that’s your idea of ‘providing a little incentive’, I’d hate to see you outright threaten someone, Luca. I truly appreciate your restraint!” you snarked.

“Anything for you, doll” he threw right back.

You scoffed, stepping back. You did a little pace, out into the room and back.

“I was at the hospital”

“When?”

“When you rang. You couldn’t get hold of me, because I slept on the floor next to my brother last night. I lay in the dark, listening to his breathing, because I was scared to leave in case he wasn’t there when I got back”

He looked up, folding a letter, and dropping it to pick up the next. He had the good grace to look even a touch guilty. His voice was more measured when he replied.

“I’d prefer you to- “

“I’d prefer you to keep your opinions to yourself for at least the next…foreseeable future, actually. Considering you just threatened to kill my brother and terrified my mother for no fucking reason”

“I had every reason” he argued, scowling, slapping a letter down on the desk.

“He’s my brother!” you shouted, and Luca threw the papers to the desk.

“And what about my brother?” he shouted back, breathing deep and quick. You swallowed, and dipped your head, the memory coming back to you “Hmm?”

“That’s not the same, that’s different” you argued. Now it was your turn to look guilty, and his to scoff.

“Yeah, it’s different” he spat, shuffling the papers back into a pile, before slapping them to scatter across the surface again. He wiped a hand over his jaw, turning in place as he tried to calm himself.

“Michael had nothing to do with that. Michael wasn’t there, he didn’t help, he didn’t have anything to do with your dad and brother”

“You said it yourself, he’s Tommy new right-hand man. Mentoring him to take his place. He might not have pulled the trigger, but he works side by side with the men who did. One day it’ll be someone else’s father, someone else’s brother” he waved his arm about, before lowering his voice, and walking behind the desk again “I’m doing the world a fucking favour”

You watched Luca move about, turning his back to you to look out the window.

“So do I” you reminded him, voice small again.

“Hmm?”

“You said ‘he works side by side’ with the men who killed your family. Well, so do I”

His head turned to his shoulder, waited for a few moments, and turned back to the window.

“So do you” he agreed.

“So, why am I not a fair target?”

“Cos you’re working with me”

“Right. Yeah. Like Polly? Polly who made you agree not to hurt her son? The son whose head you just put a gun to and scared the shit out of him?”

“It’s business”

“It’s business” you repeated, the words sour in your mouth.

“Yeah, it’s business! You can’t handle it, you need to find some other place to be” he turned around and sat in the chair, rolling his thumb over his lips.

“You know, I think that’s a good idea” you whispered, stepping back. You ignored his call after you, slamming the door to the suite, and barged passed Matteo. You got halfway down the corridor, before another flood of hot blood rolled through you, and you turned. Matteo was already in the room, and you stopped in the doorway.

“Stay the fuck away from my family. I think you forget that I came to you for their sake. If I’m willing to do that, to betray Tommy, and risk losing everything, to risk death by working with his enemies…what the hell else do you think I’m capable of when someone threatens them, hmm?”

Matteo tried to look invisible, stood between the two of you, with his head bowed. Luca sat in his chair, staring your down. He had his arm up on the rest, and his hand rolled open and closed, the rosary at his wrist curling with each movement.

“Don’t underestimate me” you reminded him, and stepped away from the door.


	4. Association

  1. 27\. 28.



“Hey, there’s- “

“Hang on” you told the secretary as you counted through the pages.

  1. 30\. 31.



“There’s someone on the phone for you” she insisted, leaning onto the edge of the desk.

  1. 33\. 34.



You kept sifting through the pages in your hands, keeping a close eye on the numbers in each corner.

“What’s it about?”

  1. 36\. 38.



“Something about cars in France? I tried to tell him you were busy and would ring back but he was…very, very insistent on speaking with you” she replied.

You stalled, lifting your head. You fanned the pages in your hand, and took a deep breath, before dropping the pages back to the table.

“Thanks, Milly. Listen, tell your manager he’s missing Page 37 and he needs to find it before the end of the day or Arthur will probably pitch him into the paint vat” you grimaced and pointed to the pages as you backed away and she smiled, picking up the stack, and heading away.

It could legitimately be about cars in France, you reminded yourself, since your job role was distinctly fluid. You’d picked up the slack while Polly was out of commission, but now you were moving back out into keeping the departments in line. The chances though. Using the Parisian Businessman line was obviously a signal. You picked up the receiver from where she’d laid it on the desk, and held it for a moment, bouncing it in your hand. Screw it.

“Shelby Company Ltd. Office of the- “

“It’s me” he interjected, and your blood boiled instantly. You stamped over to the door, or as far as you could reach without pulling the phone off the table, and kicked it shut.

“You can’t keep calling the office” you snapped.

“It’s the middle of the day, where else would you be?” he asked, as if that was the problem here.

“Luca” you hissed “I am so unbelievably angry and stressed right now, that this is- “

“Hold your horses. I’m calling to apologise, alright? Let’s get this worked out”

“Let’s get this worked out? Let’s- “you groaned, dropping the receiver to your hip as you calmed yourself “My lunch starts in 12 minutes, so get talking”

“Listen, I- “

“We need codenames or something” you interjected, the thought coming to you.

“We need codenames?” he questioned, his voice incredulous.

“You can’t keep calling the office making shit up, Luca” you dropped your voice “And I can’t keep saying your name down the phone in the middle of a busy office”

“What even is your job over there?” he asked, and you picked up the phone, carrying it around with you as you paced. Your heels clacked against the freshly polished floors.

“At the moment, dealing with you”

“No really, you work in the treasury, but Matteo said you were talking about going to galas and sealing contracts, is that usually a job for the accountancy to deal with?”

“If they want numbers to add up they do”

“My girl does it all, huh?” he asked, and you dropped back against the desk, perching on the edge as you slammed the phone down.

“Stick the flattery bullshit and say your piece” you picked at a gash in the wood of the desk. You and Michael had sat against the back wall, throwing letter openers against the side of the wood one late night until it was littered with scrapes and slashes.

“I wasn’t fair yesterday. I was still worked up about the ambush and I took that out on you, that wasn’t right”

“What fucking ambush?” you turned away from the scrapes, frowning.

“The ambush on the bridge. Tommy sent some friends to hold me and my men up. Retaliation for what I did to your brother, I assume”

“Oh, fuck” you whispered, dropping your head again “what did they do?”

“They shot at us. They slit my drivers throat, and they shot at us”

You rolled your neck back, looking up at the ceiling with a sigh.

“I miss when the biggest problem in my life involving guns was trying to hit a pigeon” you said, eyes closing.

“What the hell are you talking about?” he droned out, and you couldn’t help but smile at the face you knew he was making.

“My uncle Cam taught to me to shoot when I was six by giving me a big shotgun and telling me to aim it at the pigeons” you frowned, lost in the memory “I wasn’t very good”

“He sounds like a lovely fella”

You stood from the desk, turning to face it, and fiddled with the cord.

“He’s not entirely there, I’ll be honest. He runs a horse yard, last I heard. Probably for the best, he’s better at horses than people”

“And pigeons” he added.

“Well, they’re not for everyone”

He laughed down the phone and you reminded yourself to stay on point.

“Are you alright?” you asked.

“Why do you think you have a right to know?” he turned your words back on you, and you rolled your eyes.

“Because, despite your best efforts to move me to the contrary…I do slightly care about your safety”

“I’m fine. Your friends can’t shoot for shit either”

“They’re not my friends” you argued.

“No…I’m your friend”

“Thought you were my guy? If I’m your girl, then you’re my guy, right?” you teased.

You heard him sigh, and mutter to himself.

“What you doing to me, huh?”

“Seems like it’s my job to make you more of a gentleman”

“Seems like it’s my job to make you less of a lady”

You smirked, filling your lungs with fresh breath. While you had him in a good mood…

“Well, I’m glad at least one of us is achieving our goals” you said, and he hummed again “We need to talk about what happened at the hospital”

“I appreciate your position, but mine hasn’t changed”

“It hasn’t?” you replied.

“No. Business is business”

You sneered, shaking your head to the empty room.

“Oh, Luca” you sighed, bitter “Business, then. Let’s frame this is terms of business. We had a deal. What about that?”

“We had a deal to spare Michael. Michael’s still breathing. The deal stands”

“You pedantic…you’re being a dickhead, you know that, right?”

Someone tried to open the door, and you swung around.

“Fuck off!” you shouted to the confused guy, who promptly shut the door and scampered away.

“You need to learn to separate the job from- “

“From my family? The only reason I even know you exist is because you crossed an ocean to avenge your family and you’re telling me I need to disconnect my feelings from the business?” you spat.

You heard him shouting at someone else on his end, Matteo by the sounds of it, and rolled your eyes. You tilted your head, and waited, seething.

“You haven’t even apologised” you reminded him “Why am I even…”

You paced again, debating what to do.

“What? Trying?” he asked.

“Yeah, Luca. Why am I trying? What are we doing here? How do we really see this ending? We going to ride off into the sunset together, huh? You’re not that guy. I’m not that girl, we’re- “you exhaled, rubbing your forehead.

“No” he replied, his tone acidic “Maybe it’s better we stick to the business”

“Yeah, you’re good at that” you turned, the cord of the phone catching on the edge of the desk, and you yanked it “so let’s discuss business. You stop circling my brother, you stop threatening my mother- “

“You stop making demands of me like you’re in a place to make them. Let’s add that” he snarked.

“Yeah, let’s” you spat sarcastically, frowning and rolling your eyes “A little distance on all fronts”

“Agreed”

“You’re really not going to admit that you overstepped the line? Not even a little?”

“Before we do that, I think you need to consider where you’re putting boundaries”

“Right, so this call achieved exactly nothing?” you turned over your shoulder as the door opened and Milly nodded to you “Oh, would you look at that. Lunchtime”

You slammed the phone down, and wove your fingers into your hair.

“He wasn’t calling about car parts, was he?” she teased, leaning her shoulder against the doorframe when you turned “I’m assuming all these closed-door phone calls and afternoons out the office are connected?”

You dropped your arms, biting your lip.

“What’s his name? Mr Secret Lover?” she smiled, raising her brows. You sighed, and let out a laugh, thankful she’d gone down that route.

“Right now, I’m calling him ‘dickhead’ but we’ll see where the days take us”

She laughed, straightening up, and nodding towards the hallway.

“Trouble in paradise. Shall we have a drink with our lunch, then?”

You reached right over the desk, yanking at your coat, and nearly bringing the chair with you.

“We shall have five, Millicent!” you pulled your coat on, and linked arms with her “I’m going to damn well need them at this rate”

-

You’d side-eyed the phone when it rang the first time, changing the direction of your crossed legs on the sofa, and turning the page with a huff.

The second time you’d flattened the book against your lap for a moment, wondering if it could be something important. You were in Watery Lane though, not the new house, and surely if it was that important someone would have rung the office or run across the street to you?

The third time it rang you groaned in rage, throwing your book down, and scrambling off the sofa. You stormed across to the alcove, yanking the receiver off the wall.

You held it to your ear, giving no greeting, and waited. The seconds dragged on, and you could hear him sigh on the other end, but neither of you spoke. You shuffled your feet, crossing an arm over your chest to support your elbow, and leaned a shoulder against the wall.

“I apologise” he finally droned out, and you let yourself smile just a little.

“Mr Changretta” you acknowledged, making sure to use his full name after this morning. Distance. Keep your distance.

“How many houses do you live in?” he asked, and you gave a little look back at the hallway.

“I get restless” you explained, keeping your answers as short as possible to wind him up as much as possible.

“You’re mercurial, that I can attest to” he replied, and you gave a sigh of your own.

“Did you need something?”

“An opportunity”

“I’ll have to speak to Polly, she knows the logistics better than me. If I ask for his schedule it will look- “

“That’s not what I meant. This isn’t business” he dragged out the last word, his tone remorseful.

You flicked your hair out of your way, leaning back fully against the wall.

“Why do you get restless?” he asked, and you frowned.

“You’re changing the subject” you pointed out, suspicious.

“I’m trying to warm you up a little, make you forget you’re pissed. Remind you how charming you find me”

You gave a bitter laugh, shaking your head at his arrogance.

“Is it working?” he asked.

“Not in the slightest” you replied, lying.

“Every time I try to find you, you’re in a different place”

“Have you ever considered that I’m just avoiding you?” you sighed.

“No. You came to me, remember. You screamed it at me not 48 hours ago”

You considered it, fidgeting with your lip between your teeth.

“I didn’t settle until I was ten. And even then, I ran off every few months. Bricks and mortar is something to get used to. You wouldn’t think it would be, but…imagine you go from living in hotels to a wagon overnight, you’d be a little twitchy too, I’d think”

“I didn’t know that about you”

“You didn’t?” you murmured.

“No. I knew the Shelbys but…”

“I’m not a Shelby” you finished for him.

“No, you’re a Gray” you smiled at his insistence, the reassurance in his voice.

“It’s how Polly knew how to find me when my parents died. Our families used to go around together, and she kept an eye out for me. Not that she got much thanks for her efforts. I got restless, I ran off a lot. Took her years to get me in the door long enough to close it behind me” you explained, skimming over the fact of your parent’s death as quickly as possible.

“I’m sorry”

“No, see, that’s two people you didn’t kill” you joked.

“You astound me” he replied, and you laughed “making jokes about…”

He hummed, letting the silence settle around you both.

“Can I ask?” he asked, tentative.

“It wasn’t like this. They weren’t like this. They just got ill. They just died. It happens” you whispered, a sad smile forming on your lips as you remembered them.

“I’m sorry”

“You keep having to apologise to me, I think that’s something to address”

“I should start sending flowers”

“Yes please” you responded, thinking better of it as soon as the words left you “except don’t, because people will be suspicious. I already have Milly going on about mystery boyfriends”

“You could have an anonymous suitor” he agreed.

“No, Arthur would find out and tell everyone and…they’d probably think you were making some kind of funeral reference and take it as a threat. We don’t want to go down that route”

“What flowers do you like?” he persevered.

“Stop considering the option” you warned him.

“I’ll get some for the hotel. You can enjoy them here”

“Ah, that was a smooth little thing you did there” you lay your back against the wall, and fidgeted with your braid.

“You caught it?”

“You dived right into that open door, huh?”

He laughed on the other end of the line, and you screwed up your face, realising you’d lost yourself in him again.

“It’s too easy to talk to you” you groaned.

“You sound disappointed”

“I am. You’re infuriating”

“I’m out of practice” he replied, and you stalled. Your face softened, and you leaned your head lightly against the wall. You heard him shuffling about, and waited.

“My mother, you see, my mother- “you could hear the affection in his voice “she’s got the patience of a saint. She’s the most understanding person I’ve ever known, and she put up with my father like…”

He broke off to laugh and you smiled, enjoying the softness of his voice as he recounted.

“But uh, this business. This business I do, it’s not conducive to…happy families, you know? No, me and Angel, we got lucky” you gave him time, listening “The business, I’m good at. But…the other stuff…”

“Luca, if you’re trying to convince me you’re no good with women, I’m going to call bullshit and hang up the phone”

He laughed.

“Maybe I’m just good with you, huh? You ever think about that?”

You took a deep breath, trying not to consider that.

“Tell me something?” you posed.

“Anything”

“No, I mean, tell me a story or something” you pulled the loop of extra cord off the hook, settling down onto the floor. You pushed up at the last minute, crawling to grab your blanket from the back of the sofa. You snuggled up against the wall.

“Why?”

“Because we’ve only known each other for nearly three months, and you’ve told me more about you in the last five minutes than all that time combined” you smiled into the empty air, pausing “besides, my mother told me never to fall in love with a man until he tells you a story first”

-

You were laughing your head off when the front door opened, shushing down the phone until you saw Polly emerge from behind the door. You sighed, slouching back down where you were shoved into the corner of the alcove.

She looked over you as she took her coat off, shaking her head when she realised who must be on the other end of the line.

“It’s alright” you mouthed, but she hurried passed you. You watched her go, tucking the phone back against you.

“I have to go” you explained.

“Stay”

“Mum’s home. She’s not…that happy with you at the moment” you got up slowly, stretching your limbs “I’m off for some damage control”

“I’ll ring you in the morning” he said, and you smiled.

“I mean it, about spending some time together. Before…it happens. Just in case”

“Told you, doll, your friends can’t shoot for shit”

Polly emerged in the doorway at the end of the hall, hovering with a smoke in hand. You kept eyes to her, solemn.

“For me, Luca” you pleaded, and Polly turned away at the mention of his name. You heard him sigh at the other end.

“I’ll send a car- “

“Not the hotel” you interjected, your mind abuzz “No, I’m feeling restless. I don’t want to be cooped up in there, feeling like I’m hiding away”

“Well, what do you have in mind?”

-

“I am slipping into madness, for the love of all that is holy, release me” you begged.

“You need to do like the rest of us and have a drink. And then another” Lizzie joked, smiling up at Polly. You looked to both women, sighing. Polly was in on this plan, but she wasn’t best pleased, and she was taking a little too much pleasure in your efforts.

“It’s not safe” Tommy replied, never lifting his head from the papers Lizzie had put in front of him.

“I’ll be on neutral ground. I’ll take a gun. I just…I need to go home for a little while, Tommy. Please, just let me get the smoke and the shit out of my head for a few days, please” you begged.

He looked up to you for just a moment, mulling over the decision. If you’d got him that far, there was a chance he’d agree. He hadn’t walked away yet, which gave you hope.

“Where are you even going to get a wagon from?”

“My uncle has ours still. He promised to keep it up for me, so that I could go home whenever I wanted. He might not have been fit to take in a child, but you can bet that thing is as pretty as the day we left it. I promise you, I’ll find a pack of my dad’s cigars, wrapped in wax paper, shoved up the back wheel still”

Polly chuckled, and you smiled over at her, both remembering the common site of your father camped out on the front steps, savouring the morning with a cigar in hand.

“Please, Tommy. Let me go home”

-

It was warm enough that the air was crisp but not unbearable, the sun laying low in the sky. The dew hadn’t cleared yet, nor the fog that lay heavy over the road. The grass was damp under foot, chilling your ankles as you slogged a bucket of water from the creek back to the wagon. You were close enough to hear the babbling water, shaded slightly in the trees, with the door to the road, just in case.

You hadn’t looked under the back wheel yet, even though you’d stared at it while eating your stew the night before, eyes set on the arc firmly. You’d sat on the steps though, the second one down off the wide topping. The one you’d sat on as a girl. You’d closed your eyes, almost felt your father’s fingers tracing your braids, smelt the smoke, heard his songs under breath. You sat there again now, toeing off your boots, waiting.

It was quiet, and clear. It was beautiful. And then you heard the engine.

You pushed up with a groan, stretching your sore arm out, and pulling your thick cardigan around yourself. You made back into your boots, pulling the laces tight, and started off towards the road. You climbed to perch on the old fencing that lay intermittently along the grass line, only some of the panels still standing. The car pulled up, and you smiled as Luca stepped out, dressed in what you assumed was his ‘casual’ suit.

His eyes went to the wagon first, then splayed across the field, and finally to you. His smile stretched out slowly, and you giggled as he stepped towards you. He lifted his hat off, one hand in his pocket.

“You find it alright?” you asked, and he scowled, but still smiling.

“I think I drove through half of England getting here” you laughed, jumping down from the fence “took about six wrong turns into, what? It’s all field and field and field out here”

“Well, now, that’s kind of the point, isn’t it?” you reminded him, moving onto the grass “you’re going to wear a suit the whole time?”

He looked down at his crisp shirt, then back to you.

“I’m not wearing a tie” he motioned with his hand “you see me wearing a waistcoat? I’m practically naked out here. I’m doing this for you, doll, don’t push your luck”

You shook your head, turning and making for the wagon again. He went back to the car, lifted a case out of the backseat, and followed after you. You threw yourself back down, on the second step, and kicked off your boots.

“So, am I forgiven?” he asked, looking everything over with suspicion.

“We’ll see how you go. Light a fire, will you?” you teased, and he dropped his case.

-

Luca was down to just his shirt sleeves, which he’d rolled up, sat on the wide step next to you. You’d grabbed a dozen blankets from inside, pushing them up around the step as the night drew in.

“Fuck it” you whispered, jumping up and toeing down the steps.

“Where you off to?” Luca asked, moving to keep eyes on you as you swung around the edge of the woodwork and made for the back wheel.

“I- “you grabbed hold of the wheel, swinging around and down, and jammed your arm up underneath. You started feeling around the panelling “-am searching for my inheritance”

He scowled, thoroughly confused, until you gave up and dropped to your bum in the grass. You shimmied in between the wheel side, only looking back out when you noticed his legs appear.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“There…. ow…is a box of cigars under here that my father never smoked. And I…want them. Come on dad!” you complained, scooting your hand around the dark.

“Ah! Yes, I knew it!” you pinched your fingers around the edge of the loose paper you could feel, and pulled, shimmying it out of the odd compartment you’d found. You had to crawl on your back, awkwardly you might add, out from under the wagon. Luca was staring down, hands in pockets, incredulous.

“Help me up” you raised your free hand, and he grabbed it, easing you up to his chest. You lifted the box before you both, triumphant. He whispered something to himself and turned back to the steps.

“What does that mean?” you asked, waiting a few moments before chasing after him “What does it mean?”

“It means I probably shouldn’t have told my mother about you until I confirmed you were sane or not” he droned out, pulling a fresh pick out of his pocket, and bringing it to his mouth.

You leant a shoulder against the woodwork and fiddled with the box in your hand.

“You told your mum about me?” you asked, wrinkling your nose.

“Yeah”

“When?”

“When she called”

“From New York?” you asked, and he looked up to you.

“Well, she don’t live in Nebraska”

You laughed, moving around him to sit back on your step.

“I don’t know where that is” you said, absent minded as you unwrapped the package.

“What?”

“The place you just said – Neb…say it again?”

“Nebraska” he said, incredulous.

“Alright, Mr American. You couldn’t even find a field”

“A field…. a field’s a bit different from a whole state, sweetheart”

“Well, not to me” you replied, folding the paper up carefully, and tucking it into a slot in the bench behind you to save.

“How the hell can a state and a field be the same thing to you?”

“Well, I’ve never been, have I? Besides, land’s land. I don’t know need to know what’s it’s called to- “you rolled your hands in front of you, and shrugged.

“What the hell are you-?” he gave up, muttering to himself in Italian.

“I like when you do that” you replied, opening the box and smiling at the full set of cigars inside.

“Do what?” he asked, still obviously put out in his voice.

“When you get so annoyed you give up on English. It’s like a little quirk. It makes me happy” you held out a cigar for him and he shook his head.

“You haven’t noticed I don’t smoke?”

“You haven’t noticed that neither do I?” you asked, waving it in front of him. He eyed it, and then you, and you rolled your eyes.

“Fine, I’ll just have a lovely nostalgic moment by myself then” you set the box aside, leaning out to push the cigar into the fire. It was almost night now, the light so low that the fire was gleaming, and you were giddy when you pulled back. You perched on the edge of the step, eyes set to the glowing end, almost too excited to give in. You did though, taking a long puff.

“Oh…no…nononono, sorry daddy” you dabbed the end against the stained wood, and put it carefully back in the box with a cough “I will honour your memory another way”

Luca was smiling when you turned back to him, having placed the box carefully on the bench.

“So- “he lifted his arm, over your head, to settled on your shoulders. He pulled you into his side, and you tucked in tight, bringing a blanket around with you to settle over your laps “this is how you grew up, huh?”

You looked out over the scene together, the sun setting behind the horizon, making statues of the trees. The babbling creek, and the crackling fire. The blues and greens and reds and oranges, cool and warmth battling together in the air.

“This is how I grew up. There's a few less screaming kids and decidedly less havoc going on but...the scenery is much the same”

“Yeah, I can imagine you running wild out here”

“I’ve told you before, I was perfectly respectable before you found me” you both laughed, Luca planting a kiss to your head.

“What’d you think?” you asked, lifting your head to meet his eyes. He looked down at you, sneaking a peek back out as the final rays dipped below the horizon. He looked back, eyes to yours.

“Well, it ain’t New York” he joked, and you wrinkled your nose at him, breathing deep when he dipped for a kiss “but it’s damn beautiful”

 

 


	5. Evaluation

The light was only just beginning to roll into the window set into the door arch when you woke. The larger ones below were covered with the heavy curtains, keeping the chilled air at bay, but the rays fell through the arch like the crest of a waterfall, pooling down into the close air of the wagon. It was warm in here, almost silent but for the bird song, and the occasional creak of settling wood.

You watched the streams of condensation slide down the frosty glass, the beats of Luca’s chest below your cheek setting a steady pace of time. Usually you were woken by the thud of the factories and furnaces, an industrial heartbeat of its own. This was softer.

His hand slid up your spine at some point, fingers creeping into your hair. You shifted as he bent his head to press a kiss to your scalp.

“Morning” you murmured.

He gave a low moan in reply, and you lifted your head, pushing up to you elbow at his side. Your eyes traced over him, dancing between the freckles under his closed eyes, the scar above them.

“Stay” you whispered. His eyes opened slowly, settling on you in the low light.

“Stay” you implored, crawling further up to bring your eyes level with his. You hovered over him, and moved your hand to his jaw, rolling your thumb down to press lightly into the cross beside his throat.

He sighed, and smiled slowly, his eyes dancing.

“Can’t stay out here forever, doll” he reminded you, and you swallowed.

“Why not?” you didn’t mean your voice to sound so sad, so raw. But being out here hadn’t lifted the weight so much as reminded you how crushing it was.

His hand came up to your cheek, thumb grazing over cheekbone, as he pulled you down to meet his lips.

“Oh, little doe, it’s time to face the lights” he murmured against your skin. You crawled up over him fully, placing your forearms at either side of his head, and pressed your forehead against his.

“Come home to me” you made him promise, rearing back to trace your eyes over the slope of his again.

“Is this home?” he asked, looping a finger through strands of your hair, swiping it away from your faces “Hmm? Where shall we go?”

“Wherever feels like this, forever” you replied, grabbing his hand, and kissing at his knuckles. He grasped at your hand, keeping a tight hold there, and at your waist, as he moved to sitting. His hands moved down and delved under the shirt you’d pulled on before crawling into the bed with him the night before.

-

There was a car pulled up in front of the house when you arrived back, shiny black paint and polished metal against the dull of the smoke. You’d hung around for a few more hours after Luca had driven off, savouring every second you had. You paused, heels clacking on the paving, and sighed as you looked around. The click of the door interrupted your hazy thoughts, and Polly stepped one foot out.

“Sweetheart”

You lifted your head, eyeing her warily. She pulled on a soft smile, nodding towards the door.

“Come on, they’re waiting”

“What’s happened?” you asked, toeing steps towards her.

“We’re having a meeting, nothing to worry about”

“Everyone’s alright?”

She nodded, wrapping a hand around your shoulders, guiding you into the house.

“Did you have a nice time?” she asked, helping you shuffle your coat off. You looked over your shoulder, turning when she stepped back.

“Yeah” you replied, voice small. She faltered for a moment, returning your soft smile, and then pulled you in for a hug. She pushed her nose into your hair, before pulling back, and framing your face with her hands.

“Yeah, it was lovely. Polly, you’re scaring the crap out of me” you eyed her warily.

“You know I love you, don’t you?” she asked, and you frowned even more.

“Always. What- “

“I do what I think is best”

“Even when it’s batshit” you agreed with her, and the two of you shared a little laugh “Mum, what have you done?”

Her smile fell slowly, eyes haunted.

“Come on, people are waiting”

-

“So. What the fuck happened today, Tom?” Arthur asked. “We all heard. Shooting in Artillery Square”

“Yeah, there was. Today, I killed three men” Tommy replied, and your heart stopped. You lifted your head, eyes pleading at Polly, who kept her eyes to Arthur. You shuffled, looking about to everyone else “Now, our enemies are down to eight”

“I suppose they took you by surprise, did they?”

“No. I knew they were coming” Tommy informed him.

Your stomach turned. Luca’s men. Tommy knew. Three dead.

“Just after Christmas, I received a letter from Luca Changretta…offering to spare my son if I gave up Tommy…and I gave Tommy up” Polly explained, and your blood ran cold.

“Because that was the plan that Polly and I agreed on” Tommy cast a look to you, and then moved back to Arthur. You didn’t hear what was said next, your mind swimming, until the words broke through.

“-didn’t get Luca, but I got- “

You closed your eyes, head dipped to the floor, and swallowed all the bile that had risen in your throat. Tommy knew. Charlie appeared behind him in the doorway, and you pushed away from the wall, moving around the corner into the kitchen. You started filling a glass with water, trying to still your shaking hand. Tommy knew. Polly knew.

The others started joking and laughing behind you as you stared out the window, stomach through the floor, heartrate up through the rafters. _Can’t stay here forever, doll._ Why the fuck not, Luca.

People started moving around behind you, pouring drinks, joking. Polly came up behind you as you heard Tommy tell Charlie the story, and you wished they’d all move quicker so you could throw up and lie on the floor where you wanted to be.

“Sweetheart”

“Don’t talk to me, don’t fucking talk to me, don’t talk to me” you repeated, eyes stuck on the strands of ink at your wrist.

“I did what I did to protect you”

“How the fuck- “you swung around, catching sight of Lizzie still sat in her chair and got a grip of yourself. You took a breath, lowered your voice to a whisper and leaned in “How the fuck is this protecting me?”

“Tommy said- “

“Tommy said. Tommy said. Tommy fucking said jump and you said how high, and you threw me in with it. How is this protecting me, mum?” you spat the last word, turning back to the sink to run cool water over your hand, patting it to your cheeks.

“We agreed as few people needed to know about the real plan as possible, which meant me and Tommy. Not even Michael knows”

“That explains not telling me shit, it doesn’t explain- “you stood back up, shaking the last droplets off your hands “You told me not to taste my freedom and that if he looked after me, that’s all you cared about, knowing the whole time you were double crossing him, lying to me, and that it was all going to end in Tommy killing him. You should have told me to run for the hills. How could you do that? How could you let me…”?

“I wanted you protected”

“So, I was right. You sent me because you thought I’d peak his interest, right? You paraded me in front of him, hoping he’d take the bait, and fall for me. And then he wouldn’t be able to hurt me, that was the plan wasn’t it”

She looked away from you, into the now entirely empty room.

“Tommy needed Luca to believe we were on his side. And that meant you had to believe we were on his side. I thought…it would make everything easier if you were- “

“There’s a difference between thinking I’m a bad actress and encouraging me to fall in love with a dead man walking, Polly”

“I didn’t know that would happen, I didn’t realise…” she looked away again, sighing, as you stepped back and started pacing.

“I’m not you Polly, I’m not like Tommy, I can’t just throw things off like that. I carry this shit! You know I do! How could you let me…?” you groaned in frustration, leaning over the table. You planted your palms, digging your fingertips into the wood.

“If you knew, you’d feel guilty. You’d know, every time you looked at him, what was going to happen. And I had the choice between giving you that, or giving you a chance to enjoy yourself for a few months. You could be in pain now, or you could be in pain later, but first you’d love. I chose what I thought was best”

“God, everyone in this family is so full of bullshit!” you shouted, slamming your hands onto the wood. The cups and glasses left clinked, shaking and sloshing in place. You stormed over to the door, ignoring her calls after you. You swung at the last moment, moving with the door.

“Be fucking honest, you did it because Tommy told you to. All that shit about being free was lies. We’re still taking orders. And Tommy thought I’d fuck it up, so he told you to lie to me”

She stood, arms crossed, in the middle of the room. You stared at her, incredulous, and scoffed.

“Everyone in this family…is so full of shit”

You stepped into the street, and slammed the door behind you.

-

Someone sat on the bench next to you, and you flicked your head up, sighing when you saw who it was. Matteo shrugged his coat off, holding it up between the two of you.

“Come on, sweetheart. I’m trying to be a gentleman here”

“Matteo, the world’s a fucking…. just…shit fucked piece of fucking shit, isn’t it?” you asked, staring ahead. You turned your head when he didn’t answer, or take the coat back, and clocked his expression.

“Yeah, alright” you took the coat off him, rising to shimmy it around you, and then clunked back to the bench “What you even doing here? Thought you would have retreated back to the hotel by now”

“Boss wants to stick around for a little while. We’re…planning the next step and he wants to get some intel first. Besides, last time we tried to go home after a job here, we got held up on a bridge and shot at so…”

“Yeah”

“Yeah” he replied.

“I’d say I don’t think they have anything planned and you’re free to go, but it turns out I’ve been kept firmly out of the loop”

“Been wondering about that”

“I don’t know whether anything I gave you was true. Some of this might be my fault” you realised, and he tutted, throwing an arm up and over your shoulders. You leaned into his side, trying to hold back the tears that had flowed from you the last few hours, walking around aimlessly as you tried to process.

“I don’t believe that, hey?” he rubbed your arm, trying to console you “you can throw an elbow, but I really don’t see you doing the double agent stuff”

You scowled, and looked up at him.

“I was literally working for you as a double agent”

He shrugged, and you rolled your eyes.

“I know what you mean” you agreed, laying your head back on his shoulder.

“You really think if I thought you’d done that to us, I’d be here right now?”

“It might all be a complicated plot to…I don’t even know anymore” you moaned, pushing your head further into his warm shoulder.

“Well, Miss Sunshine, if it’s alright with you, I’d like to get back in the car and get the fuck out of here”

“You really can’t talk, every time I see you, you’re complaining about something”

“Every time I see you, I got something to complain about” he snarked, pressing a kiss to your crown and hugging you in tighter for a moment. No hard feelings.

He stood, reaching his arms out to pull you up.

“You look ridiculous in that” he nodded to where his coat was nearly down to your ankles, your wrists bundled in the too long sleeves. You looked yourself over, and then him.

“As do you, but you don’t see me saying it”

He smirked at you, placing a hand on your back, leading you towards the car.

“I got a lucky fucking escape with you, didn’t I?”

“You’d be lucky to have me” you replied.

-

Matteo drove you to a building in the Italian neighbourhood, and you looked around as he helped you out of the car.

“I know this place” you mumbled, swinging your head to check the other end of the street.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Tommy’s girlfriend used to live round here, I was friends with her little sister for a bit” he shut the door, stepping beside you. You pointed down to an alley “my names carved in a brick down there somewhere”

“Thought you didn’t grow up with him?”

“I didn’t, not in the house, but I’d visit. We’ve always been…. sort of family” you adjusted the coat, having pulled it off your shoulders, your arms holding it around your ribs “Probably why he hasn’t put my brains onto some alleys bricks by now”

“Hey, boss would never let that happen” Matteo replied, guiding you into the building. Your heels clacked against the tiles in the entry, nervous as you eyed the number of men hanging around the stairways.

“You making friends?” you whispered to Matteo, taking the first step. The men nodded to each other, looking around, letting you pass.

“Friendly ground means friendly faces” he replied, and you laughed lightly, ascending as quickly as you could “we thought it was best to have some reinforcements”

He stepped around you as you reached what was apparently the right floor, taking off down a hallway. It was still a block of flats, you realised, as people stood in doorways, continuing their conversations over your head as you passed. Children ran between them, and you had to step aside a few times to avoid the oncoming rabbles.

You smiled, stomach turning as you heard barely muffled shouting coming down the hall. You moved through a set of heavy doors onto a turn off the main way. Another row of flats, but the doors were all wide open with no one chatting in them. A man stood in each one, keeping guard. Matteo stopped at the last doorway and knocked. A face poked out, and then stepped aside, the door opening.

Luca was roaring at a group of men, loud, quick Italian that didn’t register with you. He saw Matteo and grumbled, clearing the room with a flick of a hand. The men filed out, half ignoring you entirely, the other throwing suspicious looks.

“Your mother lied to me” he rasped, and you rolled your shoulders back, slipping Matteo’s coat off. You held it out for him, and he nodded, stepping out of the room as well.

“You and me both” you replied, eyeing the stripped-out apartment “have there always been safe houses in here? I’m starting to re-evaluate some memories”

He lifted his head, hand stalling where it had been wiping at his mouth, and squinted at you.

“Ok, you’re pissed. I’ll shut up”

“Did you know?” he asked after a moment, and you scoffed, your skin rolling. You stood straight again, turning aimlessly on the spot “Did you- “

“No!” you swung back, screamed at him.

“You tried awful hard to keep me from coming back that morning” he pointed up at you, taking slow steps away from the bare window.

“Yes, because I think I love you and it scares me!” you blurted out, every thought and emotion you’d battled with on your walk bubbling back up. You sighed, collecting yourself.

“I’m scared that I love you. I’m scared that you’re going to die. I’m scared that you surviving means someone else I love having to die. I’m scared what Tommy’s going to do to me. I’m scared that my mother lied to me, and put me in this situation, and that I didn’t realise. I’m scared that everyone I trust is untrustworthy. I’m…fucking terrified. Every moment of the day”

You took a deep breath, and started pacing. You swallowed the tears that were thick in your throat. Luca leaned back against a wall, letting you vent.

“And for just a little while, just a few moments, I didn’t feel scared. I wasn’t hiding in Small Heath. I wasn’t hiding from Tommy. I wasn’t in a safe house, arguing with my…what are you my boyfriend?” you motioned between the both of you “I woke up and I felt like we weren’t this. That we were just people, who were falling in love, and had a fucking chance at being happy. I wanted to live in that moment forever, Luca.

So, yes, I tried to keep you from coming back to this” you spat the word, gesturing around you “I didn’t know Tommy was in on it. I was lied to, so I wouldn’t have to lie to you. I feel terrible, and confused, and more than a little angry. So maybe keep your indignation to yourself if you have nothing useful to do with it”

He pushed up, started a slow pace of his own. He sighed, and wiped a hand over his face, before pausing. His eyes stayed clasped shut as he thought. You paused where you were, too drained to even expend your nerves. At once the moment broke, the stillness, as he marched over to you and pulled you into his chest.

“Alright, I’m sorry, ok? I’m sorry, I didn’t- “

“I think I love you, Luca, what the fuck am I- “you sobbed.

“Hey, hey” he pulled your chin up, wiping at your cheek with his thumb. He peppered kisses over the damp skin, nuzzling into your temple as you heaved in breaths “what you doing to me? Huh?”

You couldn’t help but laugh, pushing up on your toes to draw him into a kiss. Your tears kept falling, and you could taste them as you pulled into one another. He drew back, eyes dancing over you.

“Listen, go home and pack a bag, alright? I want you with me until this is over”

“Luca…”

“Don’t argue with me” he dipped for another peck, hand tight at your jaw. You breathed him in, pushed your forehead against his cheek as the two of you refused to break apart fully. You sniffled and calmed your breath.

“Don’t tell me what to do. I’ve had enough of people telling me what to do” you croaked, and he chuckled back, the sound rolling through you. He looked down at you, tilting his head as he sighed.

“You know, when you first walked in that door on that first day…” he smiled wide, reminiscing “I thought ‘they sent a mouse in here for the lion”

You half rolled your eyes, flicking them up into the socket, before dipping your head with a nervous smile. He followed the movement, mirroring it. He rolled his body around yours, found his way into your space until you were sure you were melting into him. His breath was hot at your throat, the mumble against your skin sending it into flames.

“And then you started talking, biting back at me, and I was lost right there” he punctuated the revelation, dating his tongue out and making you jump, landing against his chest. You let out a breath, almost a giggle, as you turned your head away. He laughed at your nervousness as you tried to disentangle yourself and he just moved his hands to hold you somewhere else. You laughed, avoiding his eyes as he tried to move into your field of vision.

“Luca!” you laughed, your voice breaking slightly, your throat still recovering from your tears. You sighed and looked up at him, fingers curling into the front of his shirt as his hands settled on your waist. He kept smiling but it settled down, fell softer on his face.

“I know I love you, doll. I’m done and dusted like you better believe” he crooned, and you sighed. He tucked you back in, bringing his lips to your forehead.

“You know, I didn’t particularly enjoy reading Romeo and Juliet, and living it isn’t much fun either” you complained, and he chuckled.

-

“You were fucking what?” Michael scowled, and you sighed deeply.

“Michael- “

“You told me you weren’t together”

“No, I said we weren’t sleeping together. Which…is still technically true. There was….”

“Stop” he leaned back with a frown. You eyed the nurse as she stepped into the room, finishing packing up Michael’s things. You lowered your voice until she left the room and pulled the door shut.

“I’m just saying, if he doesn’t marry me after all, I can, you know…still probably get away with it, but- “

“Stop”

“I haven’t been a complete saint either” you admitted, eyes tracing over the ceiling “he’s…a fucking beautiful man”

“…Stop”

“I’m not confessing any of this specifically to you, so much as it just needs to be said, you know?” you flapped your hands before you, illustrating “I’ve been keeping a little web in my head and now everyone knows everything, it’s freeing”

“Well, lock it back up” Michael groaned, reaching for a cigarette.

“He tried to kill me” he reminded you.

“He’s tried to kill a lot of us” you replied, and Michael gave a sarcastic acknowledging nod, unable to reply until he put his lighter back down and freed his lips.

“He came in and threatened me, he put a gun to my head” he motioned to the door, cigarette in hand, and it made you almost nauseous to see how much of Tommy there was in the action.

“Yeah” you cleared your throat.

“And then you went off- “

“Michael, listen- “

“And…cavorted in a forest with- “

“Sorry, I did what?” you unfolded your arms, leaning forward against the table.

“There was still blood pouring out of me- “

“You burst a stitch, it’s not like he tore your spleen out. Did you really use the verb ‘cavorted’ to describe- “?

“He’s a fucking madman, and he’s been…” he grimaced, and looked to his cigarette, before taking his deepest drag yet “with my sister”

“Cavorted?” you emphasised.

He rolled his eyes up to you, staring you down, showing how unimpressed he was.

“Michael…sweetheart…we’ve both made some terrible decisions romance wise, haven’t we? Alright. So, let’s neither of us judge”

“My girlfriends have never waged a war against the family”

“Well…pick someone more ambitious, then” you tried, and he rolled his eyes, dropping it back against the chair.

“Is it real?” he asked after a long break in the conversation.

“I don’t really have a frame of reference but…if this isn’t, God help me when it is because…” you let out a long breath.

“You’ve got terrible fucking taste”

“Yeah, I couldn’t have chosen someone more unsuitable, could I? Fucks sake”

“Why are we so messed up?” he wondered, and you made a vague noise of confusion.

“Love you, brother. Despite all the shit”

“Despite all the shit. I love you, too”

-

“What are you doing?” Polly asked, and you ignored her “Answer me”

You straightened your back, pausing at the use of her ‘stern mother’ tone. You finished folding the jumper in your hands, and dropped it into the case.

“Michael’s in a safe place now, think it’s time I found mine. There’s little reason for me to stick around until this is over and he comes back”

“You’re going nowhere. Tommy’s orders” she insisted, and you scoffed.

“Tommy can shove his orders where the sun doesn’t shine. I don’t belong to him”

“You don’t belong to Luca Changretta, either” she replied, and you smiled, turning to her.

“No…I belong to me. And I’ve made a decision”

She sighed, slamming the bedroom door behind her.

“And where are you going to go?” she waved her arms in front of her, pacing only a few steps each way.

“The hotel? A safe house? The wagon? A cabin in Canada? I don’t know. Somewhere other than here” you decided.

“This is ridiculous”

“Yeah, we agree on that”

The two of you fumed, neither of you able to form words.

“He’s…he didn’t- “

“No. He wouldn’t” you replied, knowing the intention “he understands family business. He doesn’t hold it against me”

“Good. Good” she said, more to herself it seemed. You nodded, the two of you having cooled.

“I know…. you think…” she started, and you dropped to the bed.

“Here we go”

“No, listen” she continued, and you shook your head.

“Polly, I don’t want to have this conversation. We…when this is done, when we know how the pieces fall. Then we’ll talk. I’m not healing wounds that haven’t finished being inflicted yet, it’ll just mean tearing them up all over again”

She sighed, but nodded.

“You need to speak to Tommy before you go”

“What? You want me dead? That’s nice, mum”

She smiled, shaking her head.

“This family is so full of shit” she agreed, and you laughed.

-

The meeting with Tommy was not particularly productive. You’d been shut in his office for nearly two hours, intermittently sat in frosty silence, and screaming at each other.

“You manipulated me into- “

“Into what? Hmm?” he leaned over, crooking his head as if he was listening up “I didn’t have to convince you of the plan, no. No, you were ready to sell me down the river, all on your own. Don’t think I’ve forgotten that”

“Oh, should I be grateful now?” you shot back “Thank you, Tommy. For being so benevolent as to not shoot me on sight”

“You betrayed me”

“Yes, Tommy. I did. I did it because of exactly this. Because you’re a manipulative piece of shit, Tommy”

He scoffed a laugh, beaming a sardonic smile, before taking a long drag.

“Yeah…” he breathed, leaning over the table “and you were willing to jump into bed with the man who killed my brother”

You almost gasped, drawing in a gulp of air in shock, before you outright laughed. A bitter tone rolled through it as you thrust yourself forward, slamming your hands to the space he left as he stepped back.

“You hypocritical, soulless- “the door creaked behind you and you both swung to it at the same time.

“Fuck off!” you both screamed, and it slammed.

“-piece of shit, bastard, Tommy Shelby”

“Yeah?” he breathed, stubbing out his cigarette violently, and reaching instantly for a fresh one.

“What the hell is happening with you and Jessie Eden? Because from what I’ve heard, you’re jumping into bed with a woman who wants to burn your empire down and hoping your dick does your diplomacy for you. You couldn’t even do a fucking horse deal without picking up some poor widow and now she’s stuck in your little game, isn’t she?

And to really top that off, your wife had barely finished bleeding out before you jumped in bed with Tatiana. I remember Grace being exceptionally fond of her, I’m sure she’d think it was a fitting tribute to her memory. Oh no, let’s not forget, that was selfless Tommy just trying to gain information for his valiant fight against, what was it again? I forget, between all the double crossing you were doing there” you stepped back, holding your hands up in surrender “Saint Tommy, OBE. The saviour of us all”

You dropped your hands, letting them swing at your sides, and sneered at him.

“Using everyone else’s souls to mop up his blood for him. Commit a sin to wash away another, that’s the doctrine, isn’t it?”

You let the words settle in the air, bile turning in your throat.

“Michael told me Alfie gave it to you straight once. When Charlie was gone. I thought that might flick some fucking switch in your head, bring up some part of you that might still exist in there” you drilled a finger at your temple “but you just don’t know who you are, do you?

You’re Tommy Shelby OBE, lord of the fucking manor, big boss when it suits you. But then when it doesn’t, you’re suddenly down trodden little Tommy again, one of the people, victim who just can’t catch a break. You’re not a victim, Tommy, you’re the fucking problem. And I’m not sorry I tried to do something about it”

You stepped back, hands carding through your hair as your tried to settle your breath.

“You’re staying at Polly’s until this is done- “

“No”

“I’m putting men on you, you’re not to leave”

“No” you replied, more insistent.

“You stay there until this is done, and then we’ll- “

“I’m not- “

He slammed his hand on the desk, sending pen and paper flying.

“Just fucking listen. Once this is over, we’ll work out this shit between us, alright? For Polly’s sake, and for Michael’s. Because whatever you think of me- “he waved his hand before you, contemptuous “I give a fuck about this family too, and whether you want to be or not, you are part of that. Now…fuck off”

He turned his back to you, the smoke rising around him as he took another draw, and you hissed.

“I’m going to stay with Luca. You want to put men on me, you do that. I’ll tell him to spare them and never leave the room, so they won’t learn shit, but they’ll be safe. They can stand in an alley somewhere, stare at a window, and you can tick your box with Polly, alright?”

You started walking out of the room, your steps faltering as you reached for the door handle. You turned and leaned your shoulder into the wood.

“You know what, Tommy? I think we’re more alike than either of us wants to think about” you scoffed a laugh, wiping a hand over your face in exhaustion “Making unilateral decisions to do what we think is right. Even when it means someone else paying a price for it. Even when it means shifting the earth under our feet. Doing stupid shit because we’re in love with people we never should have been”

You laughed bitterly, resting your head against the doorframe. You stared into space, drained.

“Never feeling like we belong anywhere. Floating from decision to decision, day to day. Grasping at whatever makes sense because we’re so desperate for it. Running from everything and everyone until we grip onto something so tight we break it”

You turned to look at his back, his bowed head.

“You can’t kill me because you’d be executing yourself. And I bury my head in the sand about Luca and what happened to John…because…it makes it easier. I guess”

You sniffed, feeling eerily settled at the realisation.

“We despise each other because we make each other realise who we are”

“We’re family. It’s our duty to be miserable for each other” he replied, and you nodded sadly.

“I love him, Tommy. Please…please try to fix this” you pleaded, tears pouring back over “I’ll…fucking atone for the rest of my life if it helps. We can…I’ll stomach the shit and try to mop up after you, alright? I’ll watch over Charlie and I’ll do my best to forgive what I see in you, if you can just…try and forgive what you see in me”

There was another flutter of smoke, and he turned slowly, dabbing the butt out softly. He raised his head, not enough to meet your eyes but enough to acknowledge you. And you waited. In silence. Together.

-

“Nobody here trusts me” you told Luca, catching his eye in the mirror.

“They just don’t know you” he replied, perching on the edge of the tub, and folding his arms. He had his sleeves rolled up, his tie off.

“They don’t know you either” you reminded him, wiping your hands off on the towel, and laying it over the rim of the sink. You turned, stepped to him, and wrapped your arms around his neck. He shifted his knees, moved his hands to your waist, and pulled you into him.

“I’m special, aren’t I?” he teased, and you rolled your eyes, not dimming your smile any though.

“Yeah, never seen anyone with an ego that big before” you joked, and he gave your waist a little grip “I like this”

“So do I” he replied, giving you a kiss before rising “come on”

He took your hand, and led you out into the main room, looking a little less bare now. Furniture had arrived from somewhere, and while it was sparse, it looked more like a home in here than a hidey hole.

“The old lady who lives around the corner thinks we just got married you know? She thinks that’s why we moved in here. She thinks all the guys are your cousins and that’s why we own the corridor now” you told him, and he laughed.

“Yeah, I know. I think Matteo’s been telling tales for his own amusement” he replied, flicking through a box of records. He picked one out, got it set up, and put his hands in his pockets as he stepped back. He looked around the room, scratching at his jaw, before delving his hand back into his pocket.

“My parents lived in a place like this when they got started”

“Yeah?” you asked, looking around at the rundown state of the place.

“Yeah” he answered with a smile, moving his eyes to you. You perched on the edge of the window sill, letting the cool breeze roll through the thin wrap you had on over your slip “Told you, I wasn’t always the auspicious man you see before you”

You laughed, shaking your head, as he walked over to you.

“Angel was nearly born by the time my dad really made it”

“I didn’t know that”

He lifted your arms, pulling you up to him, and started circling around.

“What are we doing?” you laughed, and he dipped into you a little more, moving your hand into his.

“We’re dancing, doll. Come on, dance with me”

“Why are we dancing?” you sighed, smiling up at him.

“Because…” he swung you both around and you burst out laughing, nearly losing your balance as you rolled your ankle around his “I remember when we lived in a place like this, and my parents would dance around at night. I used to sneak out of bed and watch them, and I’d think – one day. One day, I’d dance with my girl around our kitchen late at night”

You hummed, moving the hand that wasn’t in his to his neck, and pulling him closer.

“The music’s pretty loud, we’re gonna bother people” you whispered.

“We’re sharing. Let ‘em dance as well” he replied, and you shook your head. You laughed, and dropped your head to his shoulder, swaying together in the middle of the room.

“I asked Tommy for your life” you murmured, breathing him in as you turned again.

“I’m going to London” he replied, and you sighed.

“Alfie Solomons?”

“Yeah. He a friend of yours?”

“He’s a…friend of Tommy’s” you reminded him, not sure about the qualifier.

“I know. I asked around”

You hummed, rolling your head back to look at him. He peered down, fingers splaying further at the small of your back.

“Come home to me” you begged.

“Is this home?” he asked with a smirk and you smiled back.

“Home’s wherever we feel like this” you reminded him, and he spun you around, pulling you back into his chest.

-


	6. Conquest

“You’re too far out, Joey, come here” you jogged over, shuffled the little boy further in, and squatted next to him. You switched the ball into the other hand, and pointed down an invisible line “You keep your eyes right there, yeah? You can’t go wrong”

He nodded, raring to go, and you fluffed his hair before moving back towards the middle of the group of kids.

“Right, bat up, here we go”

He fidgeted with the slightly-too-big cricket bat for a moment, face pinched in focus as you prepared to bowl. There was a rumble behind you as you did, and you followed the ball from the bat, to the air, to behind you. The rumble was cars pulling into the courtyard, and the ball was heading straight for the convoy.

“Oh, shit” you mumbled, just as it bounced off the span of shiny black metal with a clunk, and trundled to a stop on the gravel before the wheel. You heard the gasp of the children behind you, the plonk of the wooden bat hitting the paving, and the patter of hurried feet back up the fire escapes.

You had to roll your lips between your teeth, and dip your head for a moment, as Matteo and Luca climbed out of the car. You could just about hold in the laugh, and gripped your hips a little tighter, raising your head.

“Welcome home, honey” you called out, laugh finally breaking through as you saw Matteo wipe down the point of impact.

“They dented my car!” he shouted, followed shortly after by a quick rumble of Italian aimed at the now empty stairways.

“Thought you borrowed them?” you teased, face screwed up in mock confusion. It dissolved, and a smirk broke through, as Luca moved over to you.

He looked over you, then the scene behind you, then you again.

“Making yourself useful?” he teased, smiling when you gave a mock punch to his gut. You pushed up onto your toes, arms wrapping around his neck to yank him down.

“Stop being tall, it’s inconvenient” you mumbled as you pulled back from the kiss, stepping backwards, and dragging him with you.

“You like that I’m tall”

“Do I?”

“Yeah, I think so- “he grabbed you, lifting you up, and heading towards the building. You shrieked a laugh, slapping at his back.

“Oh, welcome home Matteo. Thanks, sweetheart. London was terrible, thanks very much for asking. I hate this place” Matteo mumbled, stomping after the two of you.

-

“Not to ruin the moment” you mumbled, and Luca hummed. You pushed up and looked at him “I have theories, and proposals”

“Sure” he replied, still sleepy. It had been a long drive up from London, and he seemed exhausted, even after sleeping the whole night.

“I just want to get things sorted before- “

“Yeah” he agreed, eyes still closed. You smiled at him, and shuffled up to his side.

“What’s your plan? For after?”

He looked up at you, shuffling his spine to get comfortable again.

“What do you mean? After what?”

“I mean after the vendettas over. Are you…just gonna go home, or?”

“You getting attached, sweetheart?” he teased, and you didn’t even bother to sigh.

“Yeah” you admitted, and he smiled, eyes falling shut again. You placed your hand over his heart, and he covered it with his own “I want you to stay. You said about staying and I…want that”

“You don’t want to come to New York with me? Brand new city, fresh start- “he pushed up onto his side, nuzzling his nose against yours. Your hands stayed pressed at his chest, and he rolled his fingers into the hollows of yours “thought you’d want the adventure”

You shook your head, biting your lip.

“I don’t think I’d fit in New York”

“Everyone fits in New York, sweetheart, that’s the point”

“I’d get restless”

“It’s New York” he reminded you, and you sighed.

“I’d miss the trees”

“We have parks” he laughed, watching you flop to the pillows in a sulk.

“I’m not done here. Not yet”

“Ah, so we get to the truth of it”

“I wasn’t making excuses” you argued, and he nodded.

“Bad ones”

“Shut up” you gave a lazy kick out at his leg.

“What’s your plan?” he asked, and you rolled your lip through your teeth again.

“Me and…Polly, Ada, Lizzie, some of the other women…all the women basically” you finally settled on “had a vision for a better future. For the family. For the company. Only we didn’t really get around to it because Tommy got everyone locked up and nearly hanged. Anyway, the vision is still there. And I think I can be the one to enact it”

“Explain it to me”

“Well, that’s the thing. I don’t think it can work”

He frowned, and looked over at the window when there was a commotion outside. It sounded like the kids setting off for school, or at least that’s what you assumed as you glanced at the clock. It usually happened around this time, and you’d worked out a little schedule, how this place worked.

“I think Shelby Co. is done. Not over, just too set in it’s ways. Michael was being set up as Tommy’s successor and I assumed once he was gone, if you got rid of him, that we’d be able to put the plan in place and reform it, but I was wrong.

I think we need to start from scratch. Build from the foundations up, it’s the only way”

“What you thinking?” he frowned, but still smiling, trying to work you out.

“I’m thinking…we start an organisation. Not an extension of Shelby Co. Not an extension of the New York business. We can work with them both, but we’d be an outfit of our own. Word is Alfie is setting up to retire. It’s why he took your deal. Last job on the way out of the door. The London boys can’t keep a truce going longer than a few months and it’s tearing the place up. If Alfie leaves, no way Sabini won’t try to assume his territory”

“You think we should let him have it?”

“No, I think we should have it” you explained.

Luca’s smile spread over his face slowly, and he let out a little laugh.

“Every time I think I have you worked out…you surprise me”

You smiled, feeling more secure in your plan as you went on.

“Yeah, and everyone else will underestimate me too. We use that to our advantage. They’ll get sloppy, and they’ll get complacent, and we sweep in and clear the place up. I’ve watched Tommy all this time, I’ve handled the factory. I’ve seen how things work, and what mistakes get made, I know what to do and what to avoid. You know how to fight a war, I know how to run a kingdom.

You win me the territories, and I’ll hold them. I’ll make them thrive, trust me”

“I do trust you” he insisted, and you loved how quickly his eyes got serious.

“We work quick, we take what Alfie leaves before anyone even realises he’s gone. We hold the line. Continuity is important. We should leave most of his lieutenants in place, I know a lot of them from Tommy’s dealings and they know how to run the Jewish neighbourhoods better than we do. It’s better for everyone if we leave them in place. This isn’t so much a conquest as a…well, no, it’s kind of conquesty. Oh no”

He laughed at your realisation, at the forlorn look on your face.

“Don’t go getting soft on me, sweetheart”

“I should ring Ollie” you whispered to yourself, and Luca waited as your mind whirred.

“Doll, come on, I’m losing you”

You took a deep breath, trying to re-orient yourself.

“Right, so…we just hold the line for a while, let people settle into it, show them we’re not the big bad”

“Aren’t we?”

“Your dad paid his tithe to Tommy because he knew it was the best course. There was no reason for war up until the end. You pay your money, the world keeps turning, everyone gets to live their life. We won’t make the mistakes…” you paused, swallowing “John fucked up, and we’ll know better. He went too far, he made it worth a war”

Luca’s hand skimmed over your ribs, giving you time to collect yourself.

“People think I’m not paying attention when I’m quiet in the corner, but I listened, and I learned. I learned watching my dad settle disputes between families. I learned watching Polly run the shop while the boys were off at war. And I read the papers, I learned how war worked. Ada took me to Communist Party meetings, and we debated politics on the bus home” you smiled, memories flooding back to you “Uncle Charlie taught us how to run a yard, and Tommy taught me how to run a factory, and I kept my head down, and my eyes open, and I learned”

You took a deep breath, keeping your eyes to his proud gaze.

“I’m ready to use what I’ve learned. I’m ready to make my own choices. I’m ready to stop running away when it gets scary. I’m ready”

“Are you? Cos this isn’t academic anymore, sweetheart, you understand that?”

“I understand. I can do this. I kept Tommy’s legitimate business running ship shape, and I can-”

“This isn’t legitimate business” he reminded you.

“I’m a quick learner”

He dropped his head back to the pillow, closing his eyes as he listened.

“You said yourself the…agreement with Sabini is a marriage of convenience. Except now you’re sticking around and moving onto the scene, it’s not particularly convenient anymore. Sabini was fine with you being around for a few months while you got your business done, but after that, he’s going to get twitchy. And Sabini’s fucking unbearable at his best, so when he’s uncomfortable- “

You sat up, crawled to the end of the bed, and reached to slam the window shut as a particularly cool breeze rolled through. Luca watched as you turned back, trying to navigate over his legs under the covers and not knee anything important.

“Anyway, take his shit and do better is the long and short of it”

His eyebrows rose, and his smile grew, a laugh pouring out of him as you looked down at him.

“I’m serious”

“You’re really advocating for a regime change, huh?”

“I’m advocating for a little empire building, dearest” you replied, your own smile widening. He settled, looking up at you. You kept his gaze for a few moments, before moving to his side, and getting under the covers again.

“I’m serious. You need to cement yourself. And if that gets me some of my very selfish goals of keeping you alive, safe, and wiping off a guy I’ve thought was an unbearable twat from the start, then…” you trailed off, giving a little shrug.

“What did he ever do to you?” Luca teased, looking over at you until his smile dropped. He propped himself up a little, staring into you “ _Did he_ do something to you?”

“Look at you...getting all protective. Mrs Imundi will be so proud. She thinks you’re respectable, you know. I don’t know what gave her that impression”

“You’re making friends with the old lady down the hall?”

“I get bored, Luca. You’re off doing your little vendetta and I’m here on my lonesome, with nothing to do but learn Italian from a cute old lady and bake cakes and…plan criminal enterprise”

“My girl runs a factory, she cooks, she plans empires. Anything she can’t do?” he questioned, and you huffed.

“Shoot straight” you muttered, and he laughed.

“Those damn pigeons, huh?”

“Listen, if they couldn’t fly, those things would be fucked” you argued, and he shook his head “I’m serious. I think they’re actually kind of cute, but…they’d be done for”

“She’s been teaching you Italian?” he asked, and you fell quiet as he turned to you “Go on”

You opened your mouth, and then sighed. You pressed your lips together and shook your head. He laughed, moving his hand to your waist.

“Come on, I wanna hear”

You shook your head again.

“Why not?”

“I said I was learning, not that I was remembering”

He laughed, dipping his head for a moment, and you gave a little whimper.

“Try” he asked, and you furrowed your brows, eyes searching his.

“You’re doing this to wind me up and I don’t appreciate it”

“No, I’m doing it because I can imagine it, and I wanna know if it’s half as good as it is in my head”

“It won’t be…believe me” you argued, and he smiled at you.

“Come on, make me melt” he teased, and you fell back, pulling the pillow over your face in frustration. He pulled it off after a moment, and you huffed. He stayed there, propped on his elbow, staring down at you with that stupid smirk on his face.

“Matteo taught me to swear, you know. I can tell you off in three languages now, how about that?”

He laughed, dipping his head to lay kisses at your collar. You pushed up onto your elbows, lifting one hand to card through his hair.

“We’re idiots” you mumbled. Your elbow shifted in the mattress, reasserting your balance. Luca traced the tip of his thumb over his forehead, letting the weight of his arm continue its movement to drop to the pillow besides you.

“Enlighten me” he drawled, and you shifted, your foot catching a roll in the covers. You pulled them up and around your legs more, shutting out the draught that caught your toes.

“We’ve known each other what, three or four months? I’m lying in your bed plotting to start a criminal empire with you. How the fuck did that happen?” the end came out more as a mutter to yourself, a question you didn’t really want answered. Answers might sour the way your skin rolled at his touch, how you arched into the warmth of his body.

“It’s half your bed” he replied, ignoring the larger point. The smirk on his face showed it was intentional. He never had got over his affection for winding you up.

“This was always the way it would happen though, I suppose” you dropped your head back, settling into the pillows. He shifted slightly onto his side, tracing a hand down the side of your face.

“How it would happen?” he muttered, pressing his lips to your forehead. There was a tingle of stubble there, tingling at your skin. You’d been lying in bed too long.

“We never made plans. We’d be somewhere, and then we’d be somewhere else. Move with the migrations, with the sun, with the breeze. Let your feet decide where they took you. Guess my heart wanted to walk a path of its own as well” you smiled to yourself, tucking further into his chest “I always thought I’d be too restless to stick around with someone, yet here I am, planning our empire”

“Is this your roundabout way of giving me a compliment, doll?” you scoffed, but he continued “because you can just say ‘you’re really special, Luca’ and it would- “

You grabbed the blankets and threw them up over your heads, plunging you into darkness.

-

The door peaked open, and you leant forward from your place on the counter.

“You decent?” Matteo called out, and you reached behind you to pick up another sweet from the packet.

“Not for a while now, but I’ve got clothes on, if that’s what your asking” you replied, stuffing the sugary treat into your mouth. Luca smiled from his place at the table as you swung your legs out a little.

Matteo appeared around the corner, leaning against the oddly coloured paintwork.

“You been telling tales about me?” he asked, face so serious it was almost intimidating, but you laughed anyway, tucking your head into your lap. You heard the crinkle of the newspaper, and Luca’s own chuckle.

You sat back up, flicking your hair out of the way, sighing.

“You were gone nearly a week, Matti boy, I had to find something to occupy my time. Besides, you got there first. Mrs Imundi told me all about your little chats”

“I just got accosted – she wouldn’t let me leave for over an hour!” he motioned towards the doorway, and you looked over at Luca, who was shaking his head at the two of you.

“I only said good things!” you argued, swinging your head back around to him. His eyes flared, and he stepped closer to you.

“Alright, alright. Everybody, simmer down” Luca said, flicking the newspaper once more.

“She feed you?” you asked, slapping your hand to him shoulder a few times.

“She did, yeah”

“She fed you”

“She did”

“Well, then” you slid down off the counter, and moved to sit on Luca’s lap. You eyed the story he was reading, about the strikes “Stop bloody moaning”

“Boss, I don’t like this girl” Matteo shook his head, picking at the bundle of wax paper on the counter, trying to work out it’s contents. He considered it for a few moments, taking a piece, and throwing it into his mouth.

“You like my sweets though, huh?”

“You make these?” he asked, pointing at them. You shook your head, leaning your head against Luca’s. His hair was still damp from the bath as you worked your fingers through the strands.

“Needed something to keep me occupied, there’s about fifteen tins in that cupboard” you waved a lazy hand over, and Matteo paused in his chewing. He stepped back, hooked a finger under the cupboard door, and looked inside.

“She gets restless” Luca explained, as Matteo flicked open tins.

“And I thought it best to keep Tommy’s men occupied while your guys sorted out some comings and goings, so I toddled off to the market one afternoon, and they followed me like good little lapdogs. Made it worth my while, there’s- “you motioned to a particular pot, and Matteo did a few unsuccessful points at the wrong boxes as you tried to guide him to the right one “candied peel in that one. It’s good. My mother used to make it for us”

He scoffed, but pinched out a piece anyway.

“Can’t imagine Polly as the- “

“My birth mum” you interjected, eyes stuck to the paper. You saw his pause in your periphery, and he put the tin back quietly.

“It’s good” he agreed, coming to sit at the table.

“Don’t be weird, Matteo. It’s uncomfortable” you replied, and he gave a little smile “So, London. Productive?”

“Alfie was exactly how you said he’d be” Matteo returned, and you smiled at the tone of his voice, wondering exactly what he’d said this time.

“Yeah, that’s Alfie”

“We got what we needed” Luca explained, pushing the paper away.

“Don’t trust him, though. Watch this be the one time he decides not to screw Tommy over” you reminded him, getting up and moving towards the kettle. You lit the stove, filling it with water, and setting it over the flames. You turned and rested against the counter.

“We’ve got some contingencies in place” Matteo explained, and you looked between them.

“Like what?” you asked, and he looked up to Luca, seeking approval.

“Tell her” Luca instructed, rising from his seat. He planted a kiss on your cheekbone, winking at you as he moved towards the bedroom “She’s part of the family now, too”

Matteo turned to you, still chewing a piece of peel. He looked you over, not convinced.

“No, really. I’m going to be your boss soon, looks like”

His face fell, and he settled into the chair further as he huffed.

“Boss!”

-

Luca cleared away the plates that evening, while Matteo told old tales of their misspent youth.

“I’m halfway over the wall when this cranky old guy from our neighbourhood starts hollering about robbers. Starts shouting at his wife to bring his gun. Well, I’m only one leg over- “Matteo mimed his position on the edge of the chair, and you laughed even harder “I get so startled, I jump three feet in the air trying to clear that thing, catch my ankle”

He slapped his hands together, waving them in the air.

“I went flying like a fucking bird, upside down into Auntie’s garden. Luca has to catch me to save me from breaking every bone in my body. I nearly tore his shoulder out it’s socket”

You pulled your legs up as you laughed again, clutching the bottle in your hand.

“She never forgave me for trampling those damn roses” he laughed, reaching for the bottle, and refilling his glass.

“I had a bruise down half my arm for weeks. Look like I’d tried to smash my way through a wall. Had scrapes all over me” Luca added, shrugging at the end.

“Bet you snuck out again the next weekend, though” you replied, catching your breath.

“The next night” they both laughed, and you shook your head at them.

“Oh, boys, what am I gonna do with the two of you?” you teased.

“I haven’t even started on the- “Matteo paused as the phone in the entry way rang, and Luca got up to answer it.

“Yeah?” he lifted one arm to rest on the wall above his head, leaning close to the phone, as if someone was right behind him listening. You frowned when he turned and looked over at you.

“Yeah, hang on” he replied to whoever was on the other end, and stepped back to motion to you “It’s for you”

You frowned even further, raising from the chair. Yes, people knew you were staying with Luca. But they shouldn’t know where. Even Tommy’s men only knew you were somewhere in the 200-room building. Luca’s face showed he was thinking the same thing as you took the receiver from him, and placed it to your ear.

“Yes?” you asked, apprehensive to hear which voice came through.

“I’ve had a fucking day and I need a chat, you free?”

You exhaled, wiping over your face as you laughed to yourself.

“Ada, you had me fucking bouncing. How the hell did you get this number?”

“When I have I ever not been able to find you, eh?”

“Ada”

“Even that time when we were twelve and you were in that hayloft for a week” she carried on, ignoring you.

“It was three days, and are you ever going to let that go?”

“One of the women who lives above you is an old friend from the cause. She recognised you and wondered whether you were entirely there of your own will” she explained.

“Well, I won’t tell Luca any of that and you better not tell anyone else any of it either” you whispered, moving further around the corner.

“How is your new man?” she asked, and you pushed your tongue into your cheek at her tone.

“He’s fine”

“Hmmm”

“Ada, when did I ever get at you about Freddie?”

There was a non-committed noise at the other end, and you smiled at your victory.

“You used to be the girl hiding out in odd places with enemy number one, remember those days?”

“Remember those mistakes” she replied, and you rolled your eyes.

“You wouldn’t change shit, admit it”

“Easier to say at this end, though isn’t it?”

“Ada, I thought you wanted to discuss the events of today, not those of yesteryear”

“I got arrested” she replied, so quick and casual, you almost didn’t catch it.

“Wait, what?” you spat, pushing away from the wall.

“Soldiers turned up at the door, dragged me off to a dingy basement somewhere. Strip searched me- “

  
“What the fuck!” you shouted, and the boy appeared around the corner. You waved them off, lifting the phone off the little shelf, and carried it clutched at your stomach awkwardly, dragging the cord behind you back to the table. It rattled and clanged as it was dropped to the table, replaced in your hand by the bottle as you poured yourself a refill.

“There’s a new guy around” she continued.

“Soldier?” you asked, and she hummed.

“Colonel Younger” she replied, giving an airy tone, only slightly laced with malice. You took a long sip, ignoring the men as they stared at you.

“Sounds like a cunt, was he a cunt?”

She laughed, and you settled back in the chair, glass in hand.

“Apparently he and Tommy…they knew each other in the war or…something. Bit of a toff, but…not what I was expecting”

“Ooohh, Ada. Is that a little bit of- “?

“No”

“No, I definitely think there was some interest in your tone. Well, well”

“Shut up!” she spat back.

“Was he nice?”

“I was naked and angry for most of it. He was offering me a deal”

“He can still be pretty and productive” you argued back, and she scoffed.

“He started talking about the old days. He’s got files on us all. All of us” she emphasised, and you sighed, flicking a look to Luca.

“Why’s he sniffing around?”

“Because Tommy made a deal” she replied, and you groaned.

“Fucking Tommy!” you shouted, dropping your head back “He’s making deals with the Army now? Why?! What does that possibly- “

“He’s going to work with them to fuck the communists, apparently”

“I thought he was already fucking communists. What happened to…we used to sit around and debate this shit together and now he’s…fucking hell. I miss being twelve”

Ada laughed, and you sighed, wiping your face as Matteo passed you the bottle. You raised it to him in a mock toast and took a swig straight from the bottle.

“Did you give him your ‘people are all shit and I’ve given up’ spiel or did talk of the past rekindle- “

“Fuck off” she cut in, and you laughed “He did it to me, too”

“Did what?”

“Started the plan without telling me” she sighed, and you hummed.

“He does that – wait, what plan?”

“I ‘have a foot in both camps’ apparently. I think they’re going to try and use me as a double agent”

“Oh, well. Doesn’t that sound familiar? Thomas Shelby making someone a double agent against their will, without even telling them until they’re half way to fuckityboo”

You slammed the bottle down, sharing a look with Luca.

“He’s got contracts for military vehicles, sounds like he’s going to be supplying half the world. Says it’s worth about 2 million”

You flared your eyes, adjusting in the chair.

“I used to get excited when his mum gave me pennies to nip the shop, and now he’s throwing stacks of cash around”

“You’re not exactly scrapping anymore, though, are you?” she replied, and you looked around the room.

“You’d be surprised. Besides, Miss ‘Head of International Bullshit’” she laughed, and you smiled down the phone, ignoring the men as they chattered quietly between themselves “none of us are who we were anymore”

“No” she agreed “We’re not”

“No. Speaking of which…” you trailed off, not sure how to phrase it.

“Oh, God. Is he marrying you? You’re not up it already, are you?”

“Well…I…let’s…not even think about that just yet” you spluttered back “Because, no. And, no. And, whoa!”

There was a release of breath on the other end and you sat up properly in the chair, fidgeting with the ring of moisture the glass had made on the table top.

“I’m…working with Luca now. For real” you explained, and waited in the silence. She didn’t reply for a long time.

“Not against you! Not like that. Just…we’re…I can’t tell you”

“You can’t tell me?” she replied, disappointed “You really don’t trust me?”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you. It’s that I don’t trust my own perception anymore”

“So, a good time to be making important decisions like throwing your lot in with a Mafia man, then?”

“Is there ever a good time to do that?” you replied, tone flat. She scoffed a laugh, settling back into the silence.

“He’s sticking around isn’t he? Whatever happens?”

“Well, if he’s dead I doubt he’ll be very productive but…yeah, I know what you mean”

“And you’re going to help him set up over here?”

“Want to join?” you asked, and she laughed “I’m not joking, Ada. I’ve got a plan”

“Oh, God. You sound like Tommy now”

“I’ll forgive that because you’ve had a long day” you shot back, smiling to yourself.

“Sweetheart…” she trailed off, and you heard something in the background, followed by a sigh “I’ve got to go. Karl’s- “

“Yeah, ok, don’t worry yourself. Think on it, though. Remember Polly’s vision? For a better company? What we discussed? I’m in, Ada. I’m going to make it happen”

She sighed down the phone again and you heard her muttering to Karl.

“I’ll…think about it. Look after yourself, yeah?”

“You too. Love you, Ada”

“Love you too”

“Give my love to Karl”

“Yeah. I’ll tell your mum you’re alright as well” she gave a little pointed reminder, and you sighed.

“I take back my love for you, you’re mean, I don’t like you anymore”

“Bye-bye” she laughed, and you dropped the phone back down. You looked up at the guys, switching your view between the two of them.

“Right, let’s talk business”

-


	7. Resolutions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I trusted an Italian friend to supply me with the translations and they may or may not have been messing with me but if they were...not my fault.

Luca’s hand settled over yours, stilling the movements of your fingers around the band at your wrist. A rosary real, red set gems gleaming against your wrist as they turned in the rolling light. You sighed, eyes catching the beams through the trees as they passed the car you were travelling in, and rolled your fingers into his grip.

He’d presented it to you in the night, passed through the dim light, veins full of whisky and dread as you prepared for the standoff.

“Well, this is ominous”

Your remark had prompted a shaking laugh from him, settling as his gaze came to yours.

“Something to protect you” he’d murmured back, eyes searching yours.

He was nervous too, no matter the words he said, the stillness in his body sat next to you in the car. You could see it in his eyes as he pressed his thumbs into the beads at your wrists – half ink, half stone, like shackles in their symmetry. You could feel it in the touch of his hand as he brought your grip together, settled your shaking fingers in his lap.

“Don’t worry, doll” he murmured, a mockery of the familiar smirk set on his face as his eyes met yours again. He gave your hand a little squeeze, sat a little further back in his seat “Today’s a beginning, not an end”

-

The air was assaulting as you entered the distillery Tommy had fashioned for himself. Somehow both icy and damp, warm and crisp all at once - stinging as it met your skin. Evaporation rolled away from the heated pipes, coiling into the room in a way that made the atmosphere even more unsettling.

You considered the optics of the scene, choices flicking back and forth in your mind. Should you keep hold of Luca’s hand? Would it re-enforce your union, your connection together? Or should you drop it and enter alone? To show you weren’t beholden to him, bewitched by him, that you were standing as your own person? They rattled around your brain, frantic considerations making you dizzy as you descended fully into the room.

Luca made the decision for you, refusing to drop your grip as you adjusted it. He set his fingers around yours, cast a quick look as you walked side by side. Together, then. You both gripped and then released as you stilled before the table, a final mark of your pact.

There was little sound once your heels quit clacking against the concrete floor, glad for the chill that rose from it now as your skin heated under the gaze of your family. You avoided Tommy and Polly as long as you could, shooting a quick wink to Finn. The sad, small smile he returned before switching his gaze set the acid of your belly rolling.

Luca took this moment to fully drop your grip, all parties having witnessed it, and the loss of its steadying influence was palpable. He had business to do, a character to portray, and you couldn’t keep clinging to him throughout all this. You took a quick breath, eyes shifting about as a sense of dread set into you, then fled again as you collected yourself. You knew this would be hard. But there was no turning back now. You were done with running.

“ _Look at them_ ” Luca teased, and you had to stop the wince that came “All that’s left of the Peaky fucking Blinders”

 _This is off to a good start,_ you thought. You made a note to take all this nervous energy out on Luca later, already assembling points of complaint in your mind. _They might be complete shits, but they’re my shits, and you didn’t need to be disrespectful_ became issue number one. _You could have endangered this whole thing before we even got it started._

He moved over to square up to Tommy, and you took the time with everyone’s attention elsewhere to dip your head and settle yourself.

“You alright, sweetheart?” Polly asked, and you lifted your head, eyes meeting hers. She wasn’t angry, wasn’t bitter like you thought she might be. She wasn’t contrite either, no. She was just Polly.

“I’m alright. Been busy” you replied, and she nodded, eyes flitting to Luca as he and Tommy stared each other down, before moving them back to you. Luca flicked a finger over his shoulder, and the lawyer stepped around you to assemble papers on the table “Hoping for a holiday after all this is sorted, actually. Might visit Alfie by the sea, what do you think?”

She dampened her smirk, amounting to little more than a flick of her cheek, but you were glad to see it anyway. She shot a little wink your way, and you sighed, could feel your eyes softening and hoped she could too.

“You ok, mum?” you made sure to use the word. Make sure it was heard. She took a few moments herself, eyes searching you, and then the line of men behind you.

“Ready for all this to be over” she replied, before switching to the language she knew Luca wouldn’t follow. The language she knew Tommy would. “ _Ready for us all to be free_ ”

Tommy gave a short look to Polly, not happy at the implication of her words, and it was oddly settling to you. This dynamic you understood.

“Can people stop saying really ominous sounding shit to me, please?” you groaned, burying your hands in your pockets as another roll of cool air blew around your legs “Tommy, for fucks sake, you need to put some radiators in here or something”

The air was broken, the familial atmosphere coming back, and Luca shot an unbelieving look over his shoulder.

“Sorry, I know you had a whole ‘Mafia boss’ thing worked out, but you brought me, so use me” you stepped forward, the lawyer moving quickly out of your way. You looked at him as he fled away from you, meeting eyes with Luca. _I’m a gangster’s girl now_ you realised, sighing heavily as the realisation set in. Ada always seemed to love this part – the people moving out of the way when she wanted their table, the people doing her bidding. It always unsettled you slightly.

“I was going to have my lawyer draw up all these papers” Luca motioned, tapping a finger to each document laid before you all “Covering every enterprise in your possession. Everything. The bars, the restaurants, the warehouses. Thought about taking the houses, too, but apparently she’s not too attached”

Luca nodded in your direction, and you tilted your head, shooting him a look he didn’t meet. At this rate, your entire argument was going to be centred around one, very well evidence, issue.

“Your life’s work…gone with the flick of a pen. Signed over to my family” he moved a little closer to Tommy, and you tried to decipher something in the blank look he gave. Nothing. The face of a soldier, as always “I was going to threaten you, I suppose. Say you give me everything, or I take it. I would have buried you all. But my mother, she knows you. She said it’ll be worse for you, if I let you live, and take everything you have”

He let it hang in the air, before stepping back.

“But, uh” he gave a little laugh, moving his eyes to meet yours, and motioning to you with a flourish. “Then I found someone who knows you even better. You’ve got her to thank for your empire”

Tommy’s eyes flicked to yours and you tried to keep your expression level. _Remember the deal, cousin. I forgive your faults, you forgive mine._

“We’re not going to take yours away, no. We’re going to build our own. And you’re going to have to step in line…or be swept away. You’re going to have to pay your tithe, and try to keep up, or watch it all slip away”

“Luca’s sticking around. We’re going to assume Alfie’s business – it’s all worked out” you explained.

Polly took a deep breath, mouth opening to protest but nothing ever came. You kept eyes with her, nodding slightly. She stilled, brow furrowing as she fought against her instinct to step in and protect you.

“It’s all worked out” you repeated, trying to comfort her.

“We’ll let you keep operating within the boundaries of your current territory. We stick to our turf, you stick to yours. One big happy family” Luca teased.

“Basta!” you sighed in exasperation, eyes meeting his as he turned over his shoulder to peer at you “Yeah you. You’re just being a dick now, enough”

He looked shocked, raising his hand to motion between you and your family.

“We’re in front of everyone” he reminded you, his voice low as though they wouldn’t be able to hear six feet away.

You shrugged, “non me ne fotte”

His eyebrows jumped, and his spine straightened a little.

“Mrs Imundi did not teach you that” he pointed at you, and you pointed yourself, over at Matteo. Luca peered over at him, and you joined him, waiting as Matteo squirmed between both your gazes.

“Anyway” you swung around, bringing it back to business. You shuffled some of the papers around, placing a specific contract on their side of the table “we drafted an agreement. A treaty. An armistice”

“This” Luca stepped up beside you, tapping the paper “sets the boundaries, sets the terms, sets the reparations”

“Reparations?” Finn questioned.

“The tithe you’ll pay, to keep the peace. You remember how these things work, don’t you, Tommy?”

“I remember how wars end” he agreed.

“And it will end” you insisted, eyes boring into him “Or I won’t be able to convince him to step back next time. And Arthur won’t be recovering in a Lee safehouse, he’ll be burnt and buried”

The three of them paused, the startled looks coming over their faces as they all looked at you.

“Yeah, I know about that. They wanted to kill him at the boxing” you nodded towards Luca and Matteo “but I convinced them not to. I convinced them to do what they did to Michael. To send a warning shot. And to let you think that you had one over on us. To remind you…”

You stepped around the table, perching on the edge next to the document.

“To remind you that I learned how to conduct business from you. And that I learned how to fight wars from him” you nodded behind you, keeping your eyes on Tommy’s “You screw us over, and we won’t be signing treaties. There’s no more retreats. We prosper together, or we tear each other apart. Mutually assured destruction, how that’s to clear the mind?”

You took a deep breath, steeling yourself.

“We can do this as one family, or two armies. Now, you were always a damn good soldier, Tommy. But you were my big brother first. Make the right fucking decision for once” you implored.

Tommy gave a lifeless chuckle, head bowing for a second, before he slipped his mask back on.

“We taught you too well” he remarked “You were right, in my office. You were right”

You let your own eyes dip, remembering the argument you’d had, the agreement you’d made. _‘_ _I think we’re more alike than either of us wants to think about’_

“So were you. We fight like family. And then we make up and move on the same” you lifted the pen where it lay by your hip, holding it up to him. He regarded it, taking it into his grip, and stepping towards the table. He gave a little sigh and bent to read the document.

“And to show our trust and commitment…” you leaned into Tommy a little, eyes rolling over his profile as he kept reading “I’ll let you in on a little secret. More of a tip”

“What would that be?”

“Don’t go to the dinner with Sabini”

He stalled, eyes flicking up to yours.

“What dinner?”

“The one he’s going to invite you to tomorrow”

You kept eyes with each other, each regarding each other. You shook your head silently, and he smiled to himself, looking back down at the paper.

“What do you have planned, eh? You used to get nervous when we’d go off and now you’re leading the charge” you sat back up as he underlined a piece “that’s too high”

“It’s lenient” you dismissed, without even checking which figure he’d objected to “And I’m a big girl now, Toma”

“Don’t call me that. You’re not a baby anymore, you can say my name. Let’s make it 30”

“Let’s make it 45” you raised, and he sighed, marking another note.

“I’m not ceding the Valley Club to you” he moved on, and you kept staring ahead.

“Oh, no. We’re not taking it, no. We’re just…overseeing it for you. Temporarily” you smirked at Polly and she raised a brow in warning. You let it drop, moving your eyes to poke your tongue out at Finn, who smiled. He seemed relieved that this was over, and a little confused that it was. All of it made you want to jump up and give him a big hug, but you kept your place.

“Things might get bumpy down in London for a bit, you’ll want us there, trust me” you explained, and he looked up at Luca. He was playing with his gloves, picking at the stitching, when you turned over your shoulder to look. Tommy shifted his head, meeting eyes with you one more time, and you gave a little nod.

“You really doing this? With him?” he questioned, and you gave a little smile, a little shrug.

“Worked for Esme and John” you reminded him “We can count on the Lees now, and you can count on the Italians. Family business is family business”

He nodded as he lowered his head again, considering.

“Don’t worry, you taught me well” you leaned into him again.

Polly stepped over, placing one hand on Tommy’s shoulder, and putting the other into your grip.

“Sign the damn thing, Thomas. Sign it and be done”

Once everything was over, papers packed away, and crowds dispersed, you about fell to the floor. You leaned over the table, swallowing down the bile as you exhaled shakily. A hand came to the back of your neck, and you rolled it into his palm.

“Well done. I’m proud of you” Luca murmured into your ear, pressing his lips to your cheekbone as you smiled into him.

-

You waited a few weeks before returning to Small Heath, time well spent in flurries of activity as you secured the holdings that had once belonged to Sabini. His men had mostly been cleared out or converted, his holdings transferred, his buildings in the process of being stripped of his presence. As for the man himself, you weren’t quite sure where Matteo had dumped him. The battle wasn’t over, but you were making good progress, and were keen to ride the high for as long as it lasted.

The door finally swung open and you sighed, pulling your hands from your pockets to raise in surrender.

“I come in peace”

Finn faltered for a few moments, stepping aside to let you in. You stepped over the threshold, knocking the toes of your shiny new heels against the wall to shake the soot off them before you entered the room proper. The family were gathered around the table, staring over at you.

“Greetings, beloved family”

Arthur looked over at Polly, then Tommy, before he raised from the table and stepped over to you. You stayed completely in place, waiting for his move before you decided yours. He stopped right before you, staring down with a blank stare for a few moments before he gave a little chuckle.

“You’re still a bloody short-arse, aren’t you?”

You tilted your head, shooting a warning look, dampened by the smirk that turned into a smile. He reached forward, gripping around your ribs as he lifted you up like he had when you were little.

“Eh? I’m gonna have to put you on the ceiling!”

“You’ll do your fucking back in, old man!” you protested, slapping and wriggling your way back down to the ground. You sighed, fluttering your hair back around you “Never forget, you’d be a head shorter without my intervention!”

He nodded down to your shoes as you shuffled on the pile of the carpet.

“Don’t think being 2 inches taller is going to intimidate anyone, love”

“They make me feel fancy” you defended, slogging a soft punch to his guts as you moved around him. He gave a grunt, grabbing and twisting your wrist as you both moved towards the rest of the group.

“Ow!” you pulled your arm away, hissing at him as he nearly made you trip over where the carpet met wood.

“Stop it, the both of you” Polly warned, taking another sip of tea.

“I’ve come to bury the hatchet” you explained, hooking an ankle around the chair and dragging it over the wood with a scrape. Tommy hadn’t moved the whole time, leaning back in his chair as he glared at you “You have your territory, we have ours. As long as everyone plays by the rules, I don’t see why we can’t still have pleasant Sunday dinners”

“Simple as that, is it?” Tommy asked, and you looked over to him. You waited a moment, giving the slow nod you’d seen him give a thousand times, eyebrow raising slightly on one side to mirror his irreverent expression.

“What do you say, b-you know what, I was about to call you boss but…” you clicked your tongue, and Tommy almost smiled.

“He’s teaching you bad habits” he joked, face still flat.

“Think it’s actually your fault” you scrunched your nose up, and his smile came out for real. You leaned forward, reaching a hand to hover over the teacups and papers “Truce?”

He considered it for a few moments, before joining his grip in yours.

“Let’s see what you’ve got” he teased, and Arthur gave an ‘ooh’, slapping a hand to the table as you and Tommy held gazes. Understanding passed between the two of you.

“He marrying you yet?” Polly questioned, and you whipped your head to her, Tommy’s hand still in your grip as he and Arthur began to laugh.

“Mother!”

Finn’s head shot round in your periphery as there was a knock on the door, and you sat back in the chair.

“You did not bring him” Polly chastised, rising from her seat as she stepped around Finn to peer out the window.

“No, actually…I didn’t. He’s dealing with some of the holdouts, there’s no way he’d have got up here in time”

Everyone stilled at your reply, eyes joining each other at the doorway. You waited, quietly, until there was another knock. You scooted your chair back and stepped off. Finn followed, hand disappearing under his jacket. A peak through the nets showed a somewhat familiar face, and you stepped back to grip the handle.

You gave a quick nod to Finn before pulling the door open just enough for you to confirm the visitor as a Lee cousin you’d seen about at family functions a few times. You eased the door open a little more once his hands were visible, resting your hip against the door jam.

“Yeah?”

The man lifted a hand, passing an envelope to you silently before turning around and heading for the wagon you saw parked down the street. You toed the door shut and hovered behind it, eyes peering over the edge of the window to watch the figure retreat. You turned the envelope in hand, over and over, eyes tracing over the curving lines and scuffed edges.

“What is it?” Polly called from the other room, and you stepped back, fingers wriggling into the paper and opening it up to your eyes.

“It’s a postcard” you noted, sliding it out of the paper confines. Finn reached over and snatched it away, barely having to move as he handed it over to Polly, all lanky limbed. You kept forgetting how he wasn’t the toddler you slung about on your hip anymore. The little fingers that had woven into your plaits now curved over triggers. He turned back to you finally and frowned at the acidic look you sent him, faltering only slightly as he chewed on the biscuit he’d lifted from the table, and shrugged.

“Who do we know in Scotland?” you asked, fingers reaching into the envelope to retrieve the scrap of fabric contained inside with a frown when Polly ignored you.  Your scowl deepened, swirling it over as you tried to discern where you’d seen it before. The pattern was familiar, but you couldn’t quite place it. You stepped back over to the table, abandoning the paper and scrap on the table with a flick of the wrist.

You smoothed your skirts under you, dropping to the chair with a thud. You bundled your coat back over yourself, using the toes of your shoes to push away from the table leg.

“Admit it, you’re a little bit proud of me” you teased, eyes set on Tommy’s grimace. He shook his head, lifting his cup again. His eyes travelled to Polly as he swallowed, arm lowering slowly as he clocked her expression. You turned your own head, stilling your rocking motions. Polly’s arm shot out, scattering the fabric from the paper as she laid all the pieces out like evidence before her.

“Mum?” you asked, leg dropping so you could land on all chair legs with another thud.

“It’s John” she muttered, eyes lifting to scatter between all your gazes in panic.

“What do you mean, ‘it’s John’, Polly… “Arthur started as Tommy moved over to assess the evidence for himself. He leant over her shoulder for a few moments, muttering to himself.

“That’s the tie we buried him in”

“Burnt him in” you reminded “So, I doubt it”

He lifted the postcard, eyes tracing the lines. He took shallow breaths, looking haunted.

“John’s alive”

-

Italian:

 **Basta**  – that’s enough/stop it

 **non me ne fotte** \- I don’t give a shit 


End file.
